CSI
King Baby

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No shit!

Tanya continues, relieved to be telling her story and fighting back tears while she does it: "So then he took me to his nursery. He explained to me about infantilism. Said that it was in the Bible, and then he made me clean him." It is here that we establish perhaps the most fundamental difference between Tanya and me. Forget that one of us was running around shtupping casino moguls at age 15 while the other was tangling with Algebra II. Forget that one us has been working as a freelance milkmaid while the other...has not. The real difference between us: if I had been faced with someone telling me infantilism was in the Bible, I would have whipped out a concordance and demanded citations.

Brass, who is still capable of expression and is therefore looking both pitying and resolute, asks how long this has been going on. "Five years," Tanya replies. "Five years, and I would ask him every week if I could see my baby. And he would say, 'Next week. Sure, Tanya, next week. Next week. No, maybe the next week after that.' I guess in my heart I knew it was never going to happen. But that was the only connection I had there to my baby, you know? That and nursing Bruce."

Catherine immediately swoops in, points out that Bruce exploited Tanya for five years, and when he was vulnerable from his bad trip, what's to say that she didn't encourage him to jump? As a matter of fact, she did, running alongside the tripping-out Bruce as he exclaimed, "I can fly!" and telling, "You sure can, Bruce! Take off! Fly for Mommy!" And as Bruce leaps over the balcony, we hear the laughter of a baby. There's probably something symbolic there about immersing oneself in one's hang-ups, but we're not going to get into it at this late stage.

Immediately after Brass finishes with Tanya, he heads over to the senior Mrs. Eiger, who makes Medea look like the founding mother of Attachment Parenting. How convenient that Bruce can blame his mother for his being a total flaming asshole. By the by, he was lying about where he took the kid -- it wasn't parked at his mom's.

And in the last scene, Gil's taken Catherine out for a meal. He tells her he's enjoyed working with her, and she asks, "Which part? The part where I got in your face, or the part where I lost evidence? Or maybe you just miss me?" Good to see that at least she's got some self-awareness, however much it lags behind her in-the-moment actions. Gil says, "I did miss you. I missed your passion and your tenacity. I even missed your tush." Well, that's the way to Catherine's heart -- treat her like a collection of body parts. Brass comes over right as Catherine's choking on her drink. He sits down and explains, "So Bruce lied about the kid -- there was an out-of-state adoption." And won't the lawyers have a field day contacting those folks and explaining how it was done without the mother's knowledge or consent?

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CSI

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