King Baby

Episode Report Card
Sobell: F | Grade It Now!
No shit!

Gil: I'm glad you decided to stay, Sofia.
Sofia: So am I...for now.

Like, way to wrap that up, guys. Catherine barges onto the scene, thanking everyone for waiting and explaining that she hustled to get to the autopsy. Gil's all, "Don't worry. We went ahead without you." Catherine takes this about as well as she took him showing up lo these 12 minutes ago. This time, she decides that this is all Sofia's fault, and after tossing a glare her way, spits, "Grissom, what the hell? Am I going to have any part of this case, or should I just go back to my office and start shuffling papers?" Sofia steps in and calmly points out, "Catherine, it wasn't personal. The body was posted and we didn't think you'd be back for a few hours. There's the report." She hands it over, and Catherine snots, "Stay out of this." It's Catherine's ability to maintain perspective and avoid assigning blame unfairly that made her management material, for sure. Sofia gives her the "You? Are crazy" look and walks off. Catherine fails to recognize how unhelpful this is with solving the case and asks irritably, "Is this an Ecklie mandate, or is this just your thoughtlessness?" Gil says, "Look, I apologize, but this is a group effort." He apologizes? To someone who just called him thoughtless without real provocation? Catherine? Shut it.

And then Catherine's day gets worse when she plugs in the camera she left outside the mansion and discovers someone stole her 256 MB memory card and replaced it with a crap-ass 32 MB card. Oh, and the crime scene pictures she took are gone too. Catherine sits there, confused as to whether she should yell and Gil and Sofia some more or take responsibility for not keeping the camera on her at all times.

While Catherine debates, Brass amiably asks the Eiger family lawyer, "Am I being strong-armed by private counsel? Because contrary to what you may think, not everybody in Vegas is under the thumb of Bruce Eiger." The lawyer plays coy about why he's there, but eventually he admits to being there so he can "do everything within our power to protect Mr. Eiger's private life...Mr. Eiger was a very private person, and although he's no longer with us, his intimates are." Brass replies, "If this is about him being a sodomite, I already knew that." The attack lawyer's all, "Uh, what?" and Brass layeth down his version of the law: "After the case is adjudicated, you can have access to the autopsy reports. In the meantime, let me do my job, okay?"

Cut to Gil and Ecklie strolling through the Labitrail and having a civil, information-sharing conversation during which no personal barbs are exchanged. Coincidentally, there are several small piglets zipping around at a six-foot altitude, and the Devil just did a triple lutz in the background. Ecklie's talking about how Bruce had wanted to take over the Queen Regent casino from Sy Magli, the gaming commission turned him down, but after a party, the deal was in place. This is clearly meant to establish that Bruce's methods of persuasion were probably neither very orthodox or ethical. Gil replies, "If the wizard of Oz had nude photos of the Wicked Witch, Dorothy would have never lost her slippers." What? That makes no sense. Did Gil only watch the movie when he was stoned and listening to Dark Side of the Moon? Ecklie muses, "If [those blackmail] files exist, it gives us a list of suspects, but nobody knows if he has dirt on everyone or just wants them to think he does." Grasshopper, Gil's Adopted Son Number Three pops up right then to share his discovery: he's pored over Eiger's home phone records for the last year, and there are a lot of calls from Eiger to Magli -- "between midnight and 4 AM. What I like to call the 'love hours.'" Gil looks repelled by the idea of Grasshopper, his Adopted Son Number Three, not slumbering soundly 'neath his tucked-in Lilo and Stitch sheets, while Ecklie's wearing a look that reads, "Gil, if you hadn't already adopted him, I would have!" So Gil contents himself with noting caustically, "It wouldn't be the first time that hate mutated into passion." Grasshopper, Gil's Adopted Son Number Three crows, "Public enemies, private lovers...so Jackie Collins."

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