Primum Non Nocere

Episode Report Card
Sobell: C+ | Grade It Now!
First, Do Not Give Away The Ending In The Title

A. It's hard to write about a character's musical talents believably. See also: Ally McBeal, where Jane Krakowski's musical chops have never been adequately explained.
B. Unless you've been incorporating a love for music into the character's development all along, this sort of thing comes off as terribly contrived.

And then -- well, Warrick and Lillie introduce themselves, and Lillie's all, "We're not strangers anymore," thus taking care to leave an opening big enough for a Mack truck on the off chance that Warrick is not too good about picking up hints when it comes to women.

Meanwhile, Gil and Sara have hit the sheets. No, not like that -- they're in the lab, examining Jane's sheets, which apparently match Rivers when it comes to the bounty of bodily fluids. Or, to quote Sara, "There are semen stains everywhere. Not very Victoria's Secret." Gil wonders what Victoria's secret happens to be; I shout at the television that it's the gift of pushing poorly-made underwear at exorbitant prices. Sara looks up from a semen stain to reply, "Beauty, Grissom." Gil looks like he's remembering why he doesn't like examining semen stains when Sara's in the room. As Gil's unfolding the fitted sheet, a slice of male toenail falls out. That does it: I can see going a little while between sheet washings when you've had a romp or two, but when your bed is so messy that giant hunks of toenail go undetected? Ewwwwww. Sara reacts to the latest discovery by saying, "With all the sex these people are having, maybe I should play hockey." Sadly, we don't get to see Gil's reaction, nor do we hear the sonic boom as Liam sprints to the nearest rink and suits up.

More Lillie; she's pressuring Warrick to reveal how much money he makes. We know these kinds of questions only lead to trouble later. Warrick says flatly, "So that's what you're all about." Lillie corrects him, "No, that's what the business is all about." "Then, run," Warrick replies. Lillie then pulls the "baby, I can make you a star!" act, and segues into a monologue about how she's going places. She then loops back around to the "baby, I can make you a star!" sell, pointing out that Warrick possesses a combination of musical talent and pulchritude that's quite bankable. Warrick's all, "I don't know about that." "You could really make a difference," Lillie presses. "I already make a difference," he replies. "Riding around, chasing ghosts with that partner of yours? Nobody even knows you exist," Lillie replies. "You do," Warrick says, which is a far more polite reply than the one I would give to someone who just dissed my livelihood and my colleagues.

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