Inside, Extremo has come to the same conclusion, singing something that can loosely be translated as, "Hey, our lead singer convinces even us he's a bad-ass / which is why he's a lead singer / but that doesn't mean he's a killer / because it would cut into the time he spends practicing all his broody looks." Or something along those lines. Nicky immediately collars the bartender Juanito, and we establish that Juanito's got the night off. He has big plans and a hat to match. He asks sleepily (or stoned), "You still looking for Carla?" Nicky's all menacing with, "No. We're looking for you." We confirm that Juanito does indeed own a full-blown "conchito mobile" (translation: "I said bag the 401(k) -- what I really want is a super-expensive truck that'll depreciate at light speed") and Vega snaps, "Oh, your pig-mobile. Nice name." Just then, the closed-captioning silently compliments Juanito on his cool belt. Audibly, he says to Nicky's silent glare, "Yeah." We notice a big hank of hair hanging from the belt. Oh, that's not obvious at all. And then we get dialogue again, with Nicky opining that it's a cool belt and Juanito getting all nervous. Juanito picks this moment to make a break for it, and as he gives chase, Nicky screams, "No, no, no, no, NO!" Well, it's about time someone on this show got loud. Someone's hollering, "Muevan se por a tras!" which is another way to say, "Move it!" Every man in the place in the place instantly goes for the piece he keeps tucked into the waistband of his pressed-and-starched Wranglers. Nicky and Vega hold off ten dozen drunken, armed, and irritated music-lovers with the sheer force of Nicky's twanged, "Este muchacho mate a una senorita innocente! Innocente! INNOCENTE!" It's so cute how he screams his Spanish with a Texas accent. And would you like to know what he's shouting? It's "This boy killed an innocent girl! Innocent! Innocent!" Since fans of narco corridos are known for their enlightened approach to innocent women and their right not to be killed in gruesome ways, the crowd quickly parts like the Red Sea and lets Nicky and Vega leave with Juanito. As they leave, Nicky's screaming a phrase he no doubt memorized in a number of languages during the Rage Diary heyday -- "Tiene que pagar" -- they must pay, they must pay, they must pay.
Episode Report CardSobell: C+ | 827 USERS: B-
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