Meanwhile, Sara's talking with Amy and her dad, explaining to the two of them that Amy was emailing photos of herself in pricey underwear to her neighbor. Mr. Keaton is stunned until Sara casually notes that Tom's been booked for statutory rape, and when Amy protests, "It wasn't rape!" Mr. Keaton explodes, "I'm going to kill that son of a bitch!" Amy snots, "Why should you care who I have sex with? I know about your parties -- all the kids know, so don't get all righteous on me! I want to see Tom." Gil calms Mr. Keaton down, just in time to get him riled up by the news that his daughter stabbed his wife after catching her with their shared lover, then watched the older woman drown. It's worth noting that Tom was a) there, and b) curiously disinclined to do anything except cover for his underage cookie. Amy insists triumphantly, "He was trying to protect me, so he put her in the fountain. He loves me." She smiles. Nobody returns the grin. Amy presses, "Can I see him?" No. Because he's about to become embroiled in a whole new class of non-standard love affair behind bars.
As Gil and Sara walk out of the interrogation room together, Sara says disgustedly, "Arrive as a couple, leave as a couple." "No photos, no video," Gil adds. "No affairs," Sara adds. "And the kids must never know," Gil finishes. And there's your deep ending for the week.
And for those of you who want to skip this week's rant, you know the drill: pretend this paragraph is about something else -- oh, let's say, the radical idea that maybe Sara and Gil should just get together and have lots of judgmental, angry, boring sex -- and skip below. The rest of you, read on: what, was this episode underwritten by Concerned Women of America, as a lesson that women who enjoy sex are depraved and will either kill or be killed? There's a valid point to be made that any sexual practice works well so long as no innocent bystanders are harmed, but this whole episode was skewed to suggest that "deviant" sexual activity will inevitably backfire disastrously, and the people who practice it are smug and repellent.
Rant over. And really, when you think about it, the idea of Gil and Sara dourly engaging in a dull affair almost makes sense after an episode like this.