CSI
Unbearable

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Bear this in mind

The lights at night / are big and bright (clap-clap-clap-clap) / upon the Strip in Vegas! / But soon they fade / we're up a grade (clap-clap-clap-clap) / far from the Strip of Vegas!

In other words, we transitioned really quickly to what appears to be a road that's going uphill somewhere. The mists roil in such a way as to suggest we are but moments from Ann and Nancy Wilson telling us how dreams go on when we sleep at night, and Brass is busy expositing at the top of his lungs: there was a BOLO out for one Lori Kyman, they've found her vehicle, but Lori is nowhere near it. Sofia hears this and wryly comments, "FOS." "What's an FOS?" Gil asks. "Another gratuitous TLA," Sofia explains. "What's a -- oh, stuff it," Gil sputters. None of that actually happened, you know: Sofia explains to Gil that FOS means "Friend of the Sheriff," and adds, "How else do you get listed as a missing person so quickly?" Brass glances over with a look like, "So cynical! Gil, if you don't ask her out, I might." Gil examines the car and notes that the doors are locked, there's no key in the ignition, and no sign of struggle -- ergo no sign of foul play. Sofia observes a flat tire and a few smudges on the truck, but that hardly changes anything. After some nameless extra pops the trunk at Sofia's behest, the music swells dramatically, and we see...nothing.

Sofia starts with the thinking aloud: "So, she gets a flat. There's no gas station around. It's a Lexus, so there's no On-Star. She must have had some kind of emergency roadside service." Well, I do. It's called "I know how to change my own damn tire in under ten minutes." However, if Lori was dependent on the kindness of AAA, she contacted them telepathically, as her cell phone log fails to show anything other than a checking-in-with-the-spouse call at 9:30 PM. Sofia thinks, "Maybe some good Samaritan offered her a lift." Gil sourly adds, "And evidently didn't take her where she wanted to go."

The Who don't care where you're taking them. They're still trying to figure out who you are.

When we get back from the opening credits and commercials, we see that the Kymans, in addition to being FOS, are also FOM. That would be "full of money," if the house is anything to go by. Sara and Brass are talking with Mr. Kyman and Lori's best friend Amy. We find out that the ladies were having a girls' night out to help Lori share those housebound post-partum blues. Amy tells them the girls went to "The Top Floor," and Brass looks at Sara and notes with a wink, "That's next to O'Shea's." I'm sure someone in the forum can explain why that's significant. Anyway, Sara peels Amy off so she can talk to her, while Brass works on Mark Kyman.

We find out that Mark manages the steak house at the Tangiers -- and what is it with that casino? Do they have their own in-house bereavement counseling group, what with the incredible number of employees and loved ones who turn up dead there? Anyway, Mark got home at 9 PM; his mother-in-law had been taking care of baby Joey.

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CSI

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