Boy, John Ross is really deep into it, isn't he? It's hard to feel sorry for him when he brought most of his troubles on himself. Plus, it's actually entertaining, which is more than can be said for some of the show's other storylines. To start with, his cousin Christopher is still chasing after his girlfriend Elena. Then there's his father, who's still out of town and not returning any of his calls. Vicente grows ever more impatient about the drilling delays. He tells John Ross a story about a Venezuelan waltz that somehow becomes a metaphor for how ill-prepared John Ross is for all of this. To buy himself some time, he tells Vicente that Marta skimmed off money from the Southfork sale. When Marta is pursued by Vicente's men, she pretends to kidnap Elena in order to get John Ross to meet with her. He shows up, argues with her, notices the camera she's using to record everything and gets even angrier. Just as he leaves, the Venezuelans show up to toss Marta out the nearest window to her death. John Ross gapes at her dead body in front of a shocked crowd, then flees the scene in the guiltiest-looking way possible. He makes it home just long enough to give Elena a hug before the cops cart him away.
Now, for the rest of the show: Rebecca vomits in the middle of thanking Elena for all her help. Elena figures out she's pregnant and later tells Christopher when he shows up on her doorstep trying to be her boyfriend again. He pouts and stamps his feet and demands Rebecca agree to a paternity test. Ann is really mad at Christopher about all of it, like something about this hits home for her. It turns out that not only is Christopher the father, but she's having twins. As to why Ann seemed to take Rebecca's side so vehemently, we get another hint about her past. Harris Ryland files charges against Bobby for assaulting him in his office last week. He offers to drop the charges in exchange for an apology. When Bobby sits down for his dinner of crow, Ryland gives him an envelope full of Ann's secrets. Bobby tells Ann about it, tells her he loves her, and then drops the envelope into the fireplace without opening it. As the envelope burns away, it reveals an old photograph of Ann holding a baby.
Stay tuned for the full weecap.
Christopher rides a horse out to the ol' lovers' tree so he can stare wistfully at the carving of his and Elena's names. Then he makes a determined face and pays John Ross a visit. John Ross is in the middle of fussing at a lawyer about the mineral trust when Christopher walks into his bedroom/office. Why isn't this guy working out of his trailer office? John Ross sees his cousin gloating in the doorway and asks, "Don't you have some cows to go birth?" Heh. Christopher hands over the DVD of John Ross getting it on with Marta saying he could have used it, but didn't have to. Instead of being glad that loose end is all tied up, John Ross smirkily remembers their childhood basketball games. "I always knew if I let you score a few points, you'd get cocky and let your guard down." Um... yeah. John Ross really needs to be saying that to himself at this point. The two of them start bickering and then Christopher's all, "I hope you don't bring Elena into this!" even though John Ross didn't mention Elena at all. There must some kind of "mentions of Elena" quota they have to meet. Christopher walks back out of the office, stopping long enough to tell John Ross that he plans to fight for Elena. Way to give your enemy a heads up, doofus.
Rebecca goes over to Elena's cottage to thank her for the trip to the hospital. While she's giving Elena a gift basket, she starts feeling all barfy and runs into the bathroom. Elena watches her gagging over the toilet bowl and looks sad because she's realized that Rebecca is pregnant. Rebecca says she only found out at the hospital and hasn't been able to reach Christopher to tell him about it. Rebecca scampers away, saying, "I'm sorry I threw up in your bathroom!" Elena stands around looking devastated.
Ann hangs around at a playground, watching all the happy children and staring sadly at her mysterious locket. She gets a call from her husband. She lies and says she's out shopping. He looks worried, sensing the hesitation in her voice, but doesn't push.
John Ross takes his cousin Lucy out to brunch at the Omni Hotel. He regales her with a childhood story about the time she found him passed out on the floor, drunk after his first glass of bourbon. "You were half-ass gone on the floor!" Lucy says with a laugh. "And the first thing I thought was, 'Yep, he's his mama's son!'" This is in reference to Sue Ellen's alcoholism. What an odd thing to laugh about. John Ross gets to the point of their reunion: He wants her to ask Uncle Gary to let them drill on Southfork, since he's one of the heirs who's siding with Bobby. Lucy seems to be against that idea, but perks up with John Ross offers a stake in Ewing Oil.