Damages

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Abundans Cautela Non Nocet

Tom is defending Patty in her defamation suit. The law works very quickly in Damages land. They didn't even give us a title saying "nine months later" or anything so we can only assume they are in court the day after Patty received notice. And even though it looks like they are in court-ordered settlement talks or mediation, it is still incredibly unlikely that even someone as illustrious as Patty Hewes could get into court that quickly. Regardless of realism, Tom and Patty sit across the table from Claire and Kendrick. Sorry, I just can't get myself to call him Walt. Do you call the devil Beezel? No, you do not. Tom claims that Patty believes her statements are true and that is an absolute defense to defamation. I am so not looking that up in Westlaw, so feel free to disagree and provide citations. Claire is having none of it and reminds the mediator that Patty called her client a murderer despite the actual perpetrator of the crime being incarcerated. Tom clarifies that Patty doesn't think Kendrick committed the crime, but he did commission it. And, the guy who was incarcerated, Kevin Walker, was murdered in jail. Claire counters that Kendrick was never questioned by the police and is not a suspect in any of the crimes. It is funny for how legal this show is, how extra-legally they function. Patty is not working with the police or the district attorney to tie Kendrick to these murders or witness tampering or blackmail, she is just a one-woman vigilante squad. The mediator asks Patty what she thinks of all this and Patty simply defers to her attorney, which is so slick that even Claire smiles. The mediator wants them to come up with a settlement. Tom wants Claire to remember that their only defense to a defamation suit is to prove that the allegation is true, which means a murder investigation. Claire doesn't even blink but instead reminds Tom that if they can't tie Kendrick to Christine Purcell's murder they will have to pay $200 million. Oh I doubt that. You know Patty could come up with reasonable doubt or whatever the standard is. The mediator thinks they all have shown ample incentive to come to terms. On opposite sides of the table, Patty and Kendrick start a staring contest.

Patty knocks on Ellen's office door and invites her to eat. Oh look they are in the same conference room as last time. That's a nice change of pace for this show. Unfortunately the one time they don't switch conference rooms is when they insist on sitting in the room with the ghastly wallpaper. The red brick, black spray paint, and white Grecian columns are truly hideous. Honestly, how can they eat in the same room as that wallpaper? The girls daintily pick away at their Chinese food and, oh look, beer. At work! I obviously worked in the wrong offices. Ellen says that David used to do most of the cooking and Patty counters with the fact that Phil is out of town. Ellen responds with a question about Phil being gone all the time and it being hard, and Patty simply stares at her impertinence and turns back to her kung pao shrimp. If Patty isn't going to talk to Ellen, why did she ask to eat with her? Oh who cares, shut up and drink! Ellen asks if UNR's defamation suit is serious and Patty assures her that Kendrick is always serious. Is he seriously fun at parties? I think last week's urinal episode would say no. Ellen wonders what Kendrick is up to, but Patty has no idea. Cut to Kendrick in the back of a car. He rolls down the window and hands Darrell Hammond a slip of paper with three numbers on it. He tells Darrell to use the keys. It's scenes like that one that make me wish I had the entire season on DVD so I could watch them all and find out what happens next.

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Damages

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