Damages

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Last week on Damages, Ellen got her bitch on and sent Patty pix of Phil's Philandering. Claire Maddox got canned from UNR for getting her itch on with Daniel Purcell.

Daniel Purcell makes breakfast for his daughter, and as he scrambles her eggs and makes her toast, the damn dog digs up a charred and dirt-encrusted piece of trash that Purcell's daughter decides to bring into the house for a little pre-brunch show and tell. Instead of donning gloves, calling Haz Mat and making his daughter stop drop and roll in a vat of Purell, Daniel just sort of shrugs and allows his daughter to leave the revolting thing on the kitchen counter. Man, you know her mother is rolling in her grave over that. Why the long stare and lack of reaction from Daniel? Guilt! Remember way back when Purcell was torching and burying something in his backyard? Turns out it was a remote control. The charred remains of which are now resting unsanitarily on his kitchen counter. I sometimes feel like doing that to my remote, too, but then I check the batteries.

Purcell pulls up to his house, but a large limousine is blocking his driveway. And, dude, Purcell, I have to mention: I hate your coat. It's like your typical quilted navy nylon puffer coat, but with a strange brown suede patch that looks like nothing but a giant unsightly facial mole that is just crying out for laser treatments. What were you thinking, wardrobe? Purcell and his coat (really, you can't help but just stare at the mole, even if it is rude) look troubled as they walk down towards the house trying to figure out which powerful, environment-hating city-dweller came to haunt his driveway. As he finally arrives on the porch, his daughter introduces him to her new best friend Walter, who came up to visit him. While I'm very pro-manners, why did his daughter feel the need to introduce him to someone he obviously already knows? Sheesh, kids really need their mothers. When Purcell sees Kendrick buddying up to his daughter he tersely tells her to go inside. She balks, but he has "Dad voice" and she buckles bidding farewell to Mr. Kendrick. Purcell wonders why he is there and reminds him that what he did to Claire Maddox was cruel. Kendrick points out that Claire didn't leave him much choice, what with trying to oust him from his own company. Kendrick, being a dick, asks Purcell how Claire is in bed. At that, Purcell kicks him off his property, but before he goes, Kendrick wants to make sure he remembers their deal. Purcell knows, and he held up his end of things, but Kendrick still hasn't cleaned up his beloved homeland of West Virginia. Aricite is killing people there. Kendrick snorts, speaking of killing people, remember your wife? And, we have a winner! Game, set, match, Kendrick. As Purcell and his jacket mole renew their request for Kendrick to leave, Kendrick reminds him that if he wants redemption, he should go to church. Um, snap? Kendrick takes his leave, but not without totally creeping Purcell out by saying how nice it was to meet his daughter. C'mon Kendrick, you've got to know how aspiring pervert that sounds. You have grandchildren, man! Get a hold of yourself.

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Damages

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