Carrie Ann just yells and says that she can't come up with any criticism because it was so awesome. Len thought the difficult and performance was great, but her lines weren't good, and he didn't see enough traditional samba steps (which he rightly places on Derek). Bruno loved it and tells Nicole she has nothing to worry about. Scores: Carrie Ann 9, Len 7, and Bruno 10 for a total of 26. Man, have the judges' scores ever been that disparate? And why did Carrie Ann give a 9? Confusing.
Last week, Pam was told she did "too much messing around" and landed in the bottom two. She doesn't want that to happen again. She's psyched to have the Argentine tango and Damian hopes to put a lot of lifts in, but Pam has trouble with them. They're dancing to an accordion version of "Enjoy the Silence" by Depeche Mode. But weirdly, it kind of works. The choreography is kind of strange, as Damian seems to be doing most of the footwork and Pamela just lets herself be flung about. I don't know if her sex appeal can carry her with the judges this week.
Len says the dance is about seduction, which Pamela can do well, and he liked the smoldering intensity. Some of the footwork suffered but the lifts were good. Bruno loves the character, and he draws the whole character sketch for her but says nothing about her dancing. Carrie Ann thought it was sexy, but she wanted to see a little more technique in her legs. Scores: Carrie Ann 7, Len 7, and Bruno 8 for a total of 22.
And finally, the couples will be competing in a swing marathon, where they will all be dancing on the floor at the same time. When they get tapped on the shoulder, they have to leave. It's just like Joanie and Fonzie on that one episode of Happy Days where Fonzie promised Joanie he'd do the marathon with her and then he had to push his motorcycle all the way home and he was exhausted but he'd promised Shortcake so he did it anyway and everyone was worried about him but no one told Joanie and she wanted to beat her nemesis Jill Higgins (played by Charlene Tilton!). So just when it looks like Fonzie is going to bow out, he gets challenged by Jill and he does a crazy Russian dance that my cousin Steve used to be able to do in an awesome Fonzie-like manner and they win. So that's my experience with a dance marathon. Is this going to be anything like that?
Everyone starts dancing and it's hard to keep track of who's doing well and who's not. The judges send Jake and Chelsie out first. Chad does a standing leap over Cheryl's head after removing his shirt. Louis is pretending to fall down under Niecy's weight. Look there's being fat-positive, which I appreciate, and then there's "fat people eat a lot of cookies and can only be the object of humor" which this is turning into. Come on, Niecy. You're better than that. Derek is doing some really un-swing like moves and I wish they would call him out on that. Niecy and Louis are eliminated second. For some reason, Evan and Anna are eliminated next, and I have no idea why. They were kind of doing figure skating lifts instead of swing lifts, maybe? But their dancing was better than Chad and Cheryl's, I thought.