Dancing With The Stars

Episode Report Card
Kim: A | Grade It Now!
Double Down

Last week, Pamela went home, and this week the final five will take on two individual dances for the first time. This is where the rubber meets the road. People are going to cry! I swear! I saw Nicole crying. Man, they love that shot of Anna and Evan doing a spin. They show it every week. It was pretty awesome. Anyway, tonight there will be drama and double the dancing! (I just made that up - I think I could have a second career writing Tom's voiceovers). And it will be LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE!

Is Brooke wearing a bandage dress? SHE IS! It's really ugly. It's electric blue and black stripes. Not only is it ugly, but it looks bad on TV. Brooke reminds us that each couple has been assigned an era to influence their dance, and we'll find out who got which era in a little bit. But first, let's watch a clip package hearing what the pros think about the various celebrities. Anna says that Erin has a great body for ballroom, but she doesn't trust Maks enough. Derek admires Evan's grace and ability, but Maks wants him to connect with Anna more. Anna says that Chad has beautiful posture (HUH? He's all hunched over) and Derek thinks Chad has untapped potential. Cheryl says that Nicole is one of the best dancers ever, and Louis points out that she's too worried about being perfect and not enjoying the ride enough. Derek and Maks want Niecy to focus more on her technique and be lighter on her feet. Not a ton of new insights there, but it went by very quickly.

Chad and Cheryl are first to go tonight. In the clip package, Cheryl urges Chad to be serious about winning instead of goofing off all the time. So here they are to do the tango. You all know I love some Ochocinco, but I'm having a hard time pinpointing what I don't like about his dancing. His upper body posture is actually pretty good this week, but there's something off about his lower body. I think it's that he keeps his legs bent all of the time, like in a semi-squat, and never rises up to his full height. And that throws off his hips. Also, he's kind of herky-jerky at times. And I don't feel like he's totally committed to the routine. I like him, but this might be his week to go. And I totally don't get the tongue bath he's been getting from the judges, so let's see if it continues this week.

Len knows that learning two dances in a week will show a dancer's imperfections, because there's not enough time for polish, and that happened with Chad. Bruno adds that Chad went for the emotion of the dance, and lacked a little footwork. Carrie Ann sees great potential in him, and loved his attack, but she noticed weird posture issues. So the judges agreed with me, or I agreed with them. Brooke asks Chad a question and then has a three second awkward pause as he's finished answering and she is probably listening to someone in her earpiece. Scores: Carrie Ann 7, Len 7, and Bruno 7.

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Dancing With The Stars




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