Dancing With The Stars

Episode Report Card
Kim: A | Grade It Now!
These Arms of Mine

Derek and Jennifer also had the fake discussion about which routine to do again. They decide to do their Viennese waltz again since it was their first routine, and Jennifer works to make it fresh but also remember the feelings she had at the beginning of the season. I can see how some people think Jennifer is a ringer (though I don't think some childhood dance lessons and a movie role 20 years ago count), and I can see how people think she's kind of fake, but she really is the best dancer, by far. Her lines are beautiful and her footwork is superb. I love to watch her dance. I could do without the interview segments, but her dancing is fantastic. Heh. They pan to the other contestants, and they all kind of have bitch face. I don't blame them; they know they've been outclassed. Carrie Ann has her usual spiritual moment with Jennifer, while Len calls her "the complete package." Bruno calls it "a blissfully beautiful waltz." So she's getting the 10s, right? They keep cutting to Jennifer's family, probably to avoid the bitchface thing.

Scores for Kyle and Lacey: Carrie Ann 9, Len 8 and Bruno 9 for a total of 26. After Brooke asks her usual dumb questions, ("How do you feel?" "How badly do you want this?"), we get Bristol and Mark's scores: Carrie Ann 8, Len 9 and Bruno 8. Bristol has a smirk on her face. Brooke has to kill some more time, which is dumb, because we now know that Jennifer and Derek are getting all 10s. Derek reaches over and pats Mark's shoulder. I wonder if they knew ahead of time that Bristol and Mark needed a certain score to win and they didn't get it, because Mark looks like he's sucking lemons. The pros all seem pretty sanguine about the whole thing. So now they find out that they'll be doing the Instant Cha Cha to "Raise Your Glass" by Pink. Then they have to pick numbers to find out the order. Kyle is first, Jennifer is second, and Bristol is third, so Bristol gets the most time to practice. I'm kind of hoping for a trainwreck, so when she loses, no one will wonder why. I'm really getting out all my anger about Bristol in this weecap, since this is my last chance. I'm still mad that Brandy went home last week. Imagine how much more exciting this finale would be if Brandy were in it instead of Bristol.

So now there is going to be a ton of filler while the finalists prepare for the Instant dance. So the first is a "humorous" video where the Hoff is sad that he got eliminated, and is moping about it, so he grabs his red jacket and his lifeguard's buoy or whatever that thing is, and runs onto the DWTS stage to "perform" a song, accompanied by Kym and two other dancers in red bathing suits. Then he and Kym do another routine, accompanied by the two other women. Since there are three women dancing, the Hoff doesn't have to do much, thankfully. So glad he wasn't on that long. The other women are Peta and Yesenia, according to Tom. So Peta's totally going to be a pro next season, right?

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Dancing With The Stars




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