Jennifer and Derek are doing the tango. Jennifer has some injuries in rehearsals, in her foot and her back. Derek wonders if he's pushing her too hard, but decides that it's what she wants, so it needs to happen. Holy shit, you guys. I just watched that whole routine without typing a word, which never happens. So they start out with business, which you know I hate, but then Derek drags Jennifer all the way down the runway onto the floor, lit by a spotlight, and it's amazing. And their whole routine is just sharp. The footwork is impressive and so much more complicated than what anyone has done so far, it's ridiculous. It's nearly flawless, as far as I can tell, and included a lot of actual dancing in addition to the lifts. Derek's choreography fits the music perfectly. Wow.
Len can barely be heard over the crowd, but he has nothing but praise. Bruno calls it "primetime delight," and can't believe the intricacy and the musicality. Carrie Ann loved the precision and the passion. I think we're looking at some tens. I also think the show is running long, because they're really cutting the judges short. Technical scores: Carrie Ann 9, Len 9, and Bruno 9 for a total of 27. Performance scores: Carrie Ann 10, Len 9, and Bruno 10 for a total of 29 and an overall total of 56. Well deserved.
Poor Bristol has to follow that up. Yikes. Bristol has trouble being sexy and Mark says in an interview that Bristol and the rumba have ZERO in common. He really emphasizes that, and if I were Bristol, that would kind of hurt my feelings. Anyway, he works with her on losing her inhibitions, and then they must know they're in trouble because they trot out her cute kid (who may be named Trot, right? Oh, it's Tripp) to try to engender sympathy votes. I am frightened of what I'm about to see. Okay, so here's the problem. Mark is unable to choreograph a rumba that isn't trashy. I've seen very nice (and highly-scored) rumbas that are beautiful and romantic without being overtly sexual. But this isn't one of them. They're practically making out on the dance floor. Bristol actually does a good job, and doesn't look super uncomfortable, but the whole time I'm thinking about what her abstinence league would think about this dance. Her baggage makes it awkward; if anyone else her age did the same dance, it would be fine. And then gross tiny Mark has to take his gross shirt off. Yuck. He really is Corky's son. Also, Bristol looks like a giant next to him.
Bruno tells her that her technique is clean, but she needs to connect her movements to make it a great performance. Carrie Ann tells her that she creates beautiful pictures, but she's dancing for Mark and not the audience. And she calls Mark out on his distraction. Len wants her to show more conviction but does praise her technique. Technical scores: Carrie Ann 6, Len 6, and Bruno 6 for a total of 18. Ooh, we're going to the clip. And Bristol has her tongue hanging out. She needs to watch that. Performance scores: Carrie Ann 4, Len 5, and Bruno 5 for a total of 14 and an overall score of 32. Aw. I thought it was better than that. And I don't want to like them.