Dancing With The Stars

Episode Report Card
Kim: B+ | 421 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Golden Girl

And now Jason Derulo is back. Look, I hate filler as much as the next gal, but I also kind of hate musical interludes on my DANCING SHOW. Also, don't fuck with Ray Charles. Dude. Oh, there are dancers for this song at least. Jason Derulo sounds like a cheesy wedding singer. Like I can imagine some girl named Georgia getting married and her dad used to sing this song to her when she was a little girl, so she uses it for the father/daughter dance. And it sounds exactly like this. This girl Georgia has red hair in this scenario. And her husband's name is Teddy. What? You think it's weird that I just made up that whole scenario? It's better than listening to this clown try to sing like Ray Charles.

Backstage, Brooke is talking to Tony and Audrina. Tony gets to tell everyone that the band missed the first four counts of their song last night, which may have messed with their timing. I'll bet. You couldn't really tell. Florence and Corky are there and Florence is totally rocking the Mrs. Brady hairstyle. She says nothing interesting, as usual. At least it wasn't gross. Then they replay some of the stuff from last night, and after their routine, Tony bitches about Carrie Ann claiming he had a lift when he knows they didn't. Except they show the part where both of Audrina's feet left the ground. Which is a lift. Oh, poor Tony. So persecuted. I really can't stand him. I felt bad for him last season with Kate Gosselin and all, but he's a dick.

So are Tony and Audrina safe? And what about Florence and Corky? Well, Tony and Audrina are safe, so at least they aren't being eliminated because of a disputed lift that totally happened. But Florence and Corky are still in jeopardy. Let's hope that jeopardy... pans out? I don't know how to say that.

The three couples in jeopardy of going home are on stage: Derek and Jennifer, Rick and Cheryl, and Florence and Corky. One more couple is safe, and to the surprise of no one in the world, it's Jennifer and Derek. I mean, really. Did anyone think they were going home? Not that it's out of the realm of possibility, but there would have been more buildup. Remember when Sabrina went home? They wouldn't stop talking about the shocking elimination.

Dancing With The Stars

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