Let's look back at the beginning of the season. Remember that? Kendra wasn't as bad as I remember. Wendy Williams was as annoying as I remember. Man, Ralph's quickstep in the first week was really great. What happened to him? He just got more and more tense every week. Anyway, after that review of the first two weeks, Petra and Dmitry are back to do their waltz again. She was really eliminated too early. She shouldn't have been a finalist, but she should have made it more than halfway. Ha, I was sitting her listening to "You Raise Me Up" and thinking, "Boy, the house band's singer is no Josh Groban." And then they cut to the sing and it was Josh Groban. I am a dummy.
Kendra is back to dance with Louis (and the rest of the male pros, I guess?). Having her dance with all of the male pros doesn't really do much if she's trying to shake her past reputation, does it? I mean, go ahead and be sexy and whatever. You go, girl. But if she's trying to be all, "I'm a mom now, not a stripper," well. She should just embrace the whole thing. Be a stripper mom. Her poor kid. Here's a shocker -- there's a lot of booty popping. And she almost falls off the judges' table.
Remember classical music week? I actually really liked that. More of that, please. Less of the freestyles and whatnot. Then there was patriotic week, which I missed because I was on vacation. Then it was Guilty Pleasures week, which is when Ralph really went nuts with the Face of Intensity and Possibly Constipation. And Karina fell. And he STILL didn't get eliminated.
So who's dancing now? They are pairing up Sugar Ray and Chris Jericho. Sugar Ray and Anna dance first, doing the paso doble. Sugar Ray is seriously just jogging around the floor, bless his heart. Then Chris Jericho comes out and his paso is pretty awesome until the end when he throws Cheryl across the floor and nearly wipes out. Didn't they do this fight thing before? I'm feeling like I saw this fight thing before, but my memory is failing me. I wish Chris Jericho got to do a solo routine. Then Chris busts out a Bruno impersonation that is scarily accurate and Bruno pretends to make out with him. This just took a turn for the hilarious. They should let Chris Jericho take Brooke's job. Except for his other full-time job.
Wendy Williams isn't going to dance, I guess. Thank God. Instead, she's interviewing... herself and Tony? And it's not in HD, which is lame. She makes a joke about how Mark wears a lot of eyeliner. And then how Kirstie would make a good drinking partner. Isn't Kirstie sober? Good one, Wendy. And then she says that Hines is hot. WTF was that? Seriously. WTF?