Dancing With The Stars

Episode Report Card
Kim: B | 555 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Guilty Displeasure

Hines took over the lead last week. This week, he has "End of the Road" and he confesses to Kym that he likes to sing it in the shower and pretend that the water is his fans. Hines shows how he practices his routines at night in his apartment and uses a pillow to be Kym. Hey, I have that same pillow in a different color scheme. It's from Target. I never said I was fancy. I have two cats, a dog and twins. And I spill things a lot. Anyway, their routine is nice, but not inspiring. Hines is more graceful than I thought he'd be, but he still has pancake hands and the whole thing feels a little bit more rushed than I'd like. There are a few really nice moments though, and he's getting better about inhabiting a character for the routine.

Len thinks that Hines is the MVP, and his routines are great every week, even if he's flat-footed. Bruno thinks they have flawless chemistry. Carrie Ann liked the performance, but she could see a look in Hines's eyes that seemed like he was thinking about the routine instead of performing. Scores: Carrie Ann 9, Len 9 and Bruno 9. So Carrie Ann wasn't too bothered by the problems she saw with overthinking, then.

What happened to Ralph Macchio, you guys? He did great the first two weeks and then he's fallen off ever since. Did the pressure get to him? Was he sad that we all thought he was wearing a wig when I've heard that's actually his real hair? Can he overcome whatever his problems have been tonight? Karina tries to find ways for Ralph to be sexy, and the solution she lands on is to have him do "wax on, wax off" moves? And then he has to dance to "Everybody Dance Now" and he's wearing a marching band jacket with long tails and... oh, it's not good. And then Karina trips over Ralph's leg which throws the whole thing off and it looks like they're fighting each other instead of dancing together. And the whole time Ralph has this look on his face like he's holding in a shit. What is happening? He looks like he's on coke or something; I don't think he really is, but he just seems overhyped. He needs to relax. It's really bad.

Dancing With The Stars

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