Dancing With The Stars

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It's a Man's Man's Man's World

Nicki Minaj is on hand to perform. I feel like I should like Nicki Minaj more than I do. I like female rappers, and she's kind of old school. I still listen to Queen Latifah. Chelsie and Lacey come out to dance with their male partners. Their contemporary routine doesn't do it for me. I've said it many times - that's not why I watch this show.

Then there's a segment about Patricia Zhou, an Asian girl who just joined the Royal Ballet. I mention the Asian part because they make a big deal about how her parents didn't want her to go into ballet, and wanted her to be a lawyer or doctor. What's most impressive is that she didn't even start ballet until she was 13. She's 17 now, and her teachers are calling her "the Michael Jordan of ballet." That's pretty amazing. And now she's here to perform. She's a lovely dancer. I'm a little concerned that she might fall out of the top of her costume because it's made for someone with breasts, but you know, not a big deal.

Ralph and Karina had a comeback last night, and their scores reflected it. Mark was pissed about their scores, and whined that Len was being two-faced. Turns out they had a private conversation where Len pointed out that the highest scores he gave out last night were two 8s, and Mark got one of them. Yeah, Mark. In your face! Mark whines further in his confessional that he doesn't know how to please Len. Here's how. Do a traditional routine. Cut the Michael Jackson bullshit and the pelvic thrusts where they're not part of the dance and the showboating. Showcase your partner for once. FOR ONCE! Gah. So let's find out who's safe. Ralph and Karina will be coming back next week. Chelsea and Mark are in jeopardy.

Brooke is backstage, where she asks Romeo about missing a day of rehearsals this week to promote his movie, and he admits that it was bad timing. She asks Kendra if she's ready to take on two dances. Kendra says she's too nervous about getting through tonight to even think about it.

Today would have been James Brown's 78th birthday. Remember when James Brown died? And they didn't bury him for a long time? That was weird. Anyway, Wayne Brady is here to pay tribute to the Godfather. Wayne Brady has had a really strange career, hasn't he? I think he was just born like thirty years too late. He would have been a great song-and-dance man in the '60s. He starts out with "It's a Man's Man's Man's World" and then goes into, "I Got the Feeling," and I'm going to predict he'll end with "I Feel Good." Just a feeling. Ooh, I was wrong. It's a "Sex Machine" interlude. And then they do the thing with the cape. I remember seeing footage of James Brown doing that when I was a kid, and I did not get it AT ALL. Like why is that man covering him with a cape? And then he throws the cape off and keeps dancing? I didn't understand that James just had to keep grooving. I am so happy that they did that whole thing without "I Feel Good." You know what's amazing about listening to James Brown's music today? Besides how awesome it is? How many of the drum tracks and licks you can recognize from being sampled in other songs. Try it. Especially "Funky Drummer."

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Dancing With The Stars

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