Dancing With The Stars
Season 16, Performance 1

Episode Report Card
admin: C | 1 USERS: B+
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Jacoby's Save

And we're back! I told my husband at dinner tonight that a new season was starting tonight. He asked me if there was anyone "good" on it. I said, "Andy Dick? Dorothy Hamill?" Then we both burst out laughing. So there you go.

The new cast is introduced, along with the same old judges and the same old hosts. We'll get to each cast member as they dance, and first up is former American Idol contestant and I guess country singer still Kellie Pickler. She looks a LOT older than she did when I last saw her on Idol. I mean, she can't be more than 30 and she looks like a 50-year-old divorcee from Tampa. Anyway, her rehearsal footage is good and she's partnered with Derek (who must have been given pretty big incentives to return this season since he seemed pretty intent on leaving after last season). Will she be able to pull it off under the spotlights?

They're dancing the cha cha cha. For the first week, she looks great. Her feet are quick, her hips have action, and her shoulders are down. There's something a little weird with her posture and I think her downfall, ironically for a musician, is that she doesn't have a ton of musicality. I feel like she's just counting in her head and doing the 8-counts and not actually feeling and interpreting the music. That may or may not come; we shall see. But good job for the first night out. Judges? Len (who is a newlywed! Go Len!) says that it was fun, even if her legs were a bit stiff. Bruno loved her shapes, but he thinks she needs to work on her legs as well. Carrie Ann thought it was fantastic, but she needs to keep up with Derek. Scores: Carrie Ann 7, Len 7, and Bruno 7. Maybe a little underscored but it's the first week.

Who's up next? Boxing champ Victor Ortiz, who's partnered with one of the new pros, Lindsay. He's got a tragic backstory; she's a new pro. I think his challenge will be his posture, based on the previous boxers on the show. They have the foxtrot. Well, he looks like he's having fun out there and his footwork is quick. His posture and arms are terrible, though. He's got serious pancake hands, too. He's not terrible, though. He doesn't screw up any steps. I've seen a lot worse in week one.

Judges? Bruno liked his charm and light-footedness, but he has a lot of work to do on his frame and his arms. Carrie Ann was surprised that his posture wasn't terrible, and he sparkled. Len thinks boxing and dancing do have a lot in common, but thought he could have had a few more wows. I think that's Lindsay's fault more than Victor's. Scores: Carrie Ann 6, Len 6, and Bruno 6. They haven't mentioned if they are keeping the half-points this season.

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Dancing With The Stars

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