Bill Engvall is a Blue Collar comedian, and he's partnered with new pro Emma. I know this guy because when I'm at my dad's, and he's flipping through the channels, he ALWAYS stops when this guy's on. He's not my cup of tea, humor-wise, but I know people like him. And by people, I mean my dad. They have the foxtrot. You know what? He's not terrible. He's light on his feet, and he he's actually kind of graceful and has decent posture. He seems to miss a few steps in there, and he really needs to change up his terrible facial expressions, but he was way better than I anticipated.

Judges? Len says he did great for week one, because he gave it a lot of "wellie" and now needs to work on technique. Bruno could sense a hint of sophistication and elegance and if he digs deep, he could show it next week. Carrie Ann was happily surprised like me, but he needs to work on his fluidity. Scores: Carrie Ann 6, Len 6, and Bruno 6.

Valeria Harper is partnered with Tristan. Poor Tristan. He always gets the older ladies. Okay, let's get into it. Valerie Harper was diagnosed with brain cancer earlier this year, and it's terminal. She was told she has three months. She has the best attitude I've heard; she thought, "Why me?" and then she realized, "Why not me?" because she's 73 and she's had a good life so now her goal is to get out there and attack it. So now it's eight or nine months later and she's ready to dance. I love her, but I feel for the judges. How do you even score her? What if she's not that good? I kind of wish she could just do this in exhibition mode because can you imagine the night she gets eliminated? Or what if she wins? This just feels wrong. Her dance is quite pretty, and she is just having a blast out there, with a huge smile on her face the whole time. The audience gives her a standing ovation.

Judges? Bruno is choked up and calls her a national treasure and an inspiration. He says she's light on her feet but she needs to work on her frame and balance. Carrie Ann is still crying and thanks Valerie for being on the show, and for her courage. Len thought it was gentle and understated with an ease and an elegance, and he compliments Tristan's choreography. Scores: Carrie Ann 7, Len 7, and Bruno 7. That's fair. She deserved that. I kind of hope she'll drop out due to her knee in like two weeks though. And then come back and do a dance at the finale.

And the final couple, Snooki and Sasha, are ready to dance. First, we get to see their rehearsal and Snooki explains that everyone thinks she's a hot mess, because she admits that she was. But now that she's a mom, she's straightened up and she's ready to dance. And then she totally biffs it in rehearsal. I laughed. Anyway, their cha cha shows off Snooki's new figure, and she has attitude to fill the room. She's really good at shaking her ass; she needs to work on the technique a bit more. And then it kind of just ends with them walking off the floor with their arms around each other? It seemed like she gave up about three-quarters of the way through. It's promising, but that wasn't fantastic.

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