Dancing With The Stars
Season 4 Performance #6: Results

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Season 4 Performance #6: Results

During the introduction, instead of focusing on Samantha and Tom, they keep showing shots of the dancers in their swing-dancing outfits, standing awkwardly on the dance floor, clapping and looking around. The judges are also clapping. Why is everyone clapping?

So let's recap last night, shall we? The judges loved Joey and Laila's routines. They were split on Apolo, due to the chair he used as a prop. The judges thought that Heather's upper body movements needed work, and Heather complains in an interview that she has to focus all of her thoughts on her legs to keep from falling. Hey, you know what this is? A dance competition. Not a keep-from-falling-down competition. Although it's kind of that, too. John and Billy Ray didn't do a lot of actual dance moves. Ian failed to bring the drama and focus, and Andrea Zuckerman in the audience was PISSED. Almost as pissed as the time that Brandon Walsh did something she considered unethical and she acted pinchy and disappointed. Oh, wait. That happened in every episode.

Tom asks Len which dance he would like to see again. Len says that all of the performances were really on point last night, so he can't pick just one, and instead would like to see the group swing dance again. Me too! Me too! Maybe this time someone will collide or fall down. Ooh, John and his partner almost screwed up their move, which would have meant her falling on her head. When I say fall down, I don't really want anyone to be hurt. Also, I just realized what this number is exactly like -- the scene in A League Of Their Own where they all go out dancing and Madonna and Rosie end up dancing together. Also, if you watch Billy Ray during this whole number, he is rarely if ever doing any of the actual moves, and when he does, he's totally out of sync with everyone else. And I still have no idea what that ending was, except Billy Ray is humping the air. Billy Ray is like a four-year-old who gets a laugh with some move or phrase, so he just keeps repeating it again and again, not really noticing that it's crossed the line from cute to annoying. Tom acknowledges that the ending of the dance was weird, so I'm glad I'm not the only one.

Next up is a performance from Joss Stone, whom I really enjoy as a singer, but whose look lately is kind of freaking me out. I liked her better when she was kind of earthy and crunchy, and now she's way too slick and polished for my tastes. She still has a great voice, though. I'm not sure what the dancers are doing while she sings, but the guys keep popping and locking. Julianne is dancing with her brother, and it's pretty astounding how much better the dancers look when they're dancing with people who know what they're doing. I bet Julianne's brother will be one of the dancers next season.

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Dancing With The Stars

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