Lacey and Lance are up next. Lance should really be doing better than he is. I blame Lacey. She explains the traditional bull/cape thing and they decide to just bag that and go with their own story. Wow, that's a great idea. In a ballroom competition. Anyway, they rehearse a lot, but I don't think Len is going to like it. Lance is dressed like Derek Hough with the sleeveless white button down shirt. Here's the thing: Lacey is not that good of a ballroom dancer. Like, I think Brooke might be better than her. I'm pretty sure Kristi Yamaguchi was better, as was Mel B. So why is she on this show? I kind of hate her. Anyway, they throw a bunch of modern moves -- like ass-smacking -- into the dance for no reason other than to be assholes. What does Len think? Len says that they can't just throw a couple of paso doble moves in there and think he'll approve. I'm with Len! Yeah! Carrie Ann thought it was unique, but there were some unnecessary parts. Bruno thinks they dropped the style and changed it to hip hop at times, and they can't do that. And Bruno gets bleeped but maybe the censors are just trigger happy after he said tits last week. Scores? Carrie Ann 7, Len 6, and Bruno 7.
Tom brags that Kim's mambo was one of the most-watched clips on the Internet last week. Um, maybe because people couldn't believe how terrible it was and forwarded it to their friends saying, "Can you believe this horseshit?" Kim has a hard time dancing sexily with Mark, because she sees him as a brother. So she goes to visit Robin Antin. Oh, I can't stand any of those Antin-ites. They're all idiots. Anyway, Robin tells her to use her hair in the choreography. That's not at all helpful. I think Kim's biggest problem is that she doesn't fully commit to the dances and she's such a fake person with no personality that she can't let her "real" personality come through in the dance. And there is no hip action. She looks like she's just going through the motions. Poor Mark's hips are working overtime, to no avail. Judges? Bruno tells her that maybe she can't dance, but she needs to be less distant and cold. Len is disappointed because she has potential but there's nothing there. Carrie Ann thinks Kim needs to watch her tapes (hee!) because she's just not getting it and all of her dances have looked the same. Ugh, please let her leave this week. Scores: Carrie Ann 6, Len 6, and Bruno 5. Higher than Rocco? Really? Blech. As Samantha interviews them, you can totally see Lacey in the back making a bitch face and rolling her eyes. Hmm. I wonder if she hates Kim or Mark.