Rocco and Karina have the rumba this week. Rocco is having a hard time channeling his emotions into the dance. In fact, when he tries to be sexy, Karina just laughs at him. I...thought Rocco was not, as they say, straight? Allegedly? I don't know why he wouldn't be out though so maybe I'm just grasping at straws - I mean Clay Aiken is out, so what's left? [Ed's note: Um, dude is straight as an arrow. -- Lauren] Anyway, Rocco cooks her a romantic meal, like somehow that's going to translate into him being a better dancer. I don't know. Let's see how it goes. Their dance starts with Rocco wearing an apron and sprinkling glitter on a platter and then Karina walks in and he walks down to begin the dance. And you know what? He's pretty good. He does a good job keeping his toes pointed and there's a little bit of hip action. I think he'll end up in the middle of the pack somewhere. Judges? Bruno thinks "the stallion has run out of juice," and there was no emotion. Carrie Ann thinks Rocco looks natural on the dance floor, but he lacks musicality. Len makes some sort of recipe analogy but basically he thought it sucked. So how does this translate to scores? Carrie Ann 5, Len 6, and Bruno 5. Man, I didn't think it was THAT bad. Rocco is very positive and smiling, which might win him some votes.
Lacey and Lance are up next. Lance should really be doing better than he is. I blame Lacey. She explains the traditional bull/cape thing and they decide to just bag that and go with their own story. Wow, that's a great idea. In a ballroom competition. Anyway, they rehearse a lot, but I don't think Len is going to like it. Lance is dressed like Derek Hough with the sleeveless white button down shirt. Here's the thing: Lacey is not that good of a ballroom dancer. Like, I think Brooke might be better than her. I'm pretty sure Kristi Yamaguchi was better, as was Mel B. So why is she on this show? I kind of hate her. Anyway, they throw a bunch of modern moves -- like ass-smacking -- into the dance for no reason other than to be assholes. What does Len think? Len says that they can't just throw a couple of paso doble moves in there and think he'll approve. I'm with Len! Yeah! Carrie Ann thought it was unique, but there were some unnecessary parts. Bruno thinks they dropped the style and changed it to hip hop at times, and they can't do that. And Bruno gets bleeped but maybe the censors are just trigger happy after he said tits last week. Scores? Carrie Ann 7, Len 6, and Bruno 7.