Dancing With The Stars

Episode Report Card
Kim: B+ | Grade It Now!
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I Try to Do A Waltz And I Stumble

Judges? Len thought the hip action was missing because Debi was a little flat-footed, but he adds that Debi was full of energy and potential. Bruno loves how she worked her bazooms. He advises her to keep her weight on the balls of her feet, but he acknowledges that it was a difficult routine. Carrie Ann thinks it's tougher for girls, but Debi needs to give more sass in her facial expressions instead of letting the audience see what she's thinking at all times. No mention of the lift, huh? Maks gives Tom a goose before he goes, as usual. Backstage, Samantha tries to make an awkward threesome joke before the scores are revealed: Carrie Ann 6, Len 5, and Bruno 5 for a total of 16. I get that the judges have to start low, but I thought she was underscored. Then again, I love her, so I might be biased.

Next up are Melissa Joan Hart and Mark. On the one hand, I've always kind of liked Melissa Joan's dorky charm from back in the Clarissa Explains It All days. On the other hand, either she loves the spotlight or she has an overzealous publicist because she is EVERYWHERE! Every time she gets knocked up, or pops out a kid, or buys something at Kitson, I feel like there is a two-page spread in People. She needs to just go away for a while, and being on this show is just another symptom of that. So we'll see. It doesn't help that I kind of hate Mark, too. In rehearsal, Mark works hard on Melissa's posture and footwork. Boring.

Their Viennese waltz begins with one of those "lying on the stairs, wandering around" vignettes that Len and I hate so much. I do dig Melissa's flowy white dress, though. Her posture is good when she's in hold, but her footwork seems a little off. Something is just awkward in their turns. She is very graceful, though, which helps a lot in the waltz. Her arms look good. I can't pinpoint what's off about her feet, but the judges probably will.

Bruno asks Melissa if she's nervous and then cackles for like a minute. Creepy. He says that it was an adequate dance, but it never caught fire, and her shoulders tensed up. Bruno knows she can do better. Carrie Ann thinks they created some beautiful moments, but it seemed a little choppy. For some reason, they cut to Donny Osmond. Boo. Len didn't like the start. Me neither! Len liked the parts where they were hold, but he points out that she didn't close her feet and needs to work on her footwork. See, I knew something was up with her feet. I think she just wasn't on her toes enough, so during the turns she couldn't pivot on the balls of her feet because she was too flat-footed. Scores: Carrie Ann 6, Len 6, and Bruno 6 for a total of 18.

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Dancing With The Stars

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