Tom claims that the stars gave dazzling performances last night. Well, some of them did. I don't know that Kelly's freestyle was dazzling. Mya's was good, but not dazzling. Anyway, I get that it's not like he's going to say that only some of them gave dazzling performances. And he promises that tonight will be jam-packed. And with that, all of this season's couples are back and walking down the stairs. Ooh, Macy Gray actually showed up. I read a rumor that she threatened to blow it off. They're doing some weird football team tunnel thing where the three remaining finalists are walking through the other couples and doing high fives. You can tell Kelly wins Miss Congeniality because all of the eliminated couples want to give her a kiss or hug. That's sweet. But it's making the producers nervous. This isn't American Idol, people. This show always ends on time, and frankly, the producers deserve an Emmy for that.

Right in the middle of the clip package reviewing last night's performances, they cut to a frozen shot of Miss Piggy with her back to the camera. After about thirty seconds, they cut to Tom, who reminds us that the show is live, and they cut to commercial to reset. Okay, so we're back. Basically, last night Kelly's tango was good but her freestyle was marred by multiple errors, but she had fun anyway, which you kind of have to admire. Mya got a perfect score on her paso, even though I still think it was too similar to Maks and Mel's, but the judges thought her freestyle didn't meet their expectations. Donny had tons of fun on the floor in his cha cha cha and then killed it on his freestyle, after the other two kind of flubbed it to put himself in the top spot emotionally, even if he wasn't on top of the scoreboard.

It's Whitney! Here to sing "Million Dollar Bill." I know her pipes aren't what they used to be, but she's still got it. I'm old enough to remember when her first album came out and it was a revelation. And then it was another revelation when she tried to dance in her videos and she was HORRIBLE. She's learned to keep the dancing to a minimum and just sing, and let her backup dancers do the work. And Mya could take some lessons from her in how to work the crowd. And it's nice to see her having some fun out there. At the end of her song, fake money is released from the ceiling and all I can think is that if this isn't pretaped, that's a lot of cleanup. At the end of the song, Whitney runs over and hugs her cousin Dionne Warwick.

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