Dark Angel
Pilot

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Amorgan: D | Grade It Now!
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Witchblade Runner
So. Max and Bruno go to a cheap-ass hotel. Its nature is cemented by the passersby who are also guests: one businessman and two leather-clad ladies with purple hair and spike heels. You get the picture, right? Right. We are all sophisticated viewers here. Bruno comes on to Max, she shoots him down, then insults him, then whomps the shit out of him, the whole time telling him that Sonrisa hired her to take him out because he did such a sloppy job with Logan. He, of course, buys the whole line. After she humiliates and beats him, she ties him up, faultily (on purpose, dontcha know), so that he can escape, "shoot" her in the back as she runs away (coward), and watch as she sinks to the bottom of the conveniently located swimming pool with nary a drop of blood seeping from her supposedly-perforated body. Commercial break. Again. Fucking ticks. Thankfully, the action did not continue without us while we were whisked away to the land of products and services for sales. When we return, Bruno is still mad, Max is still at the bottom of the pool. Bruno storms off to kill Sonrisa for trying to take him out, he conveniently forgets the money, Max climbs out of the pool, and calls her PI to have him trace the speed-dial number for her. He reminds her that his phone is bugged, but she doesn't care, 'cause she's tough like that, yo. He gives her the address and she races off to it, and so does the head bad guy, who's got a hard-on because his little plan to find Max is working out. Max and the Army dash over to Sonrisa's hangout. When Max gets there, the head bad guy tells the entire US Army to seal the perimeter, the windows, doors, air vents, and ratholes, then wait for his signal to go in and get her. The Army complies. Ohhhhh, I wonder how Max is going to get out of this one. Once inside, Max scoots right upstairs, right past the unwitting kidnappers who are all watching boxing. The Army circles the building, but Max grabs one of them and then she is in the Army, too! How did she go from being inside and upstairs, to outside and on the street? Hm. She is a genetically-engineered super-being. I guess she's got her ways. So the Army busts in to the warehouse, out-numbers and out-toughs the kidnappers, secures the building. But where is Max? Oh, there she is! She is carrying Sophy right past the head bad guy. Whoa, is she wearing a lot of eye make-up. The head bad guy stops her, then tells her to put Sophy in his car. Phew. He didn't notice her eye make-up. Boy, I sure did. He's not very clever, for a head bad man. The Army reports that there is no trace of Max in the building, just as we hear the sound of her motorcycle revving and zooming away.

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Dark Angel

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