Dark Angel

Ep.

Title

Air/Pub'l

Grade

Author

2-21
Recap

Freak Nation

Freak Nation - The tensions between the transgenics and the Seattle residents culminate in a showdown between Max's gang and a special ops team from White's breeding cult.

05.02.2002
05.07.2002
B-

Kim

2-20
Recap

Love Among The Runes

Love Among The Runes - Max finds out more about her father, Sandeman, and the rest of her family.

04.25.2002
05.02.2002
B+

Kim

2-19
Recap

She Ain't Heavy

She Ain't Heavy - As paranoia about transgenics rises, White captures Max's cloned sister, Sam. It turns out that Sam has a husband and a kid, so White holds them hostage in order to get Sam to lead him to Max.

04.18.2002
04.19.2002
B+

Kim

2-18
Recap

Dawg Day Afternoon

Dawg Day Afternoon - The military is hunting Joshua down in the sewers. While Max is trying to help Joshua, White is trying to make things harder for both of them.

04.11.2002
04.12.2002
B

Kim

2-17
Recap

Hello, Goodbye

Hello, Goodbye - Max breaks things off with Logan for his own good. Joshua meets a blind girl, but he has to break up with her for her own good. White meets up with a transgenic named Mule who he has to break...er, kill for his own good.

04.04.2002
04.07.2002
B

Kim

2-16
Recap

Exposure

Exposure - Max and Logan find White's kid and try to bust him out, and we find out a little more about the breeding program.

03.21.2002
03.25.2002
B-

Kim

2-15
Recap

Fuhgeddaboudit

Fuhgeddaboudit - A former Manticore Psy-Ops transgenic shows up and messes with Max's life.

03.14.2002
03.16.2002
B-

Kim

2-14
Recap

Love in Vein

Love in Vein - Max meets up with another Manticore escapee who has managed to attract a cult following.

03.07.2002
03.08.2002
C

Kim

2-13
Recap

Harbor Lights

Harbor Lights - Max gets shot while trying to save a little kid, and she and Logan race to cover up her true genetic nature and prevent White and the CDC from keeping her captive.

02.07.2002
02.12.2002
C

Kim

2-12
Recap

Borrowed Time

Borrowed Time - Max and Logan have twelve hours to do it, and they don't. Also, there's a monster.

01.31.2002
02.05.2002
C+

Kim

2-11
Recap

The Berrisford Agenda

The Berrisford Agenda - Alec went undercover when he was still at Manticore, and fell in looooove with a girl. And then he had to kill her dad.

01.17.2002
01.24.2002
B+

Kim

2-10
Recap

Brainiac

Brainiac - Asha and the S1W are working on exposing police corruption, and wind up getting arrested themselves. The weird part is that some guy named Brain seemed to know everything that was going to happen moments before it actually did. Max and Alec track down the mysterious Brain, and hijinks ensue.

01.10.2002
01.15.2002
C-

Kim

2-9
Recap

Medium Is The Message

Medium Is The Message - We find out a little more about White's home life, and it doesn't end well. Also, Joshua starts earning his keep.

12.13.2001
12.17.2001
B-

Kim

2-8
Recap

Gill Girl

Gill Girl - Some fishermen capture a mermaid, and sell her to a strip club. White orders her brought to him. After suffering yet another "Logan's going to die because of me" scare, Max also sets out to save the mermaid, along with Alec.

12.06.2001
12.10.2001
C+

Kim

2-7
Recap

Some Assembly Required

Some Assembly Required - Zack returns, but there are some problems with his brain, so he has to be put out to pasture.

11.15.2001
11.20.2001
D+

Kim

2-6
Recap

Two

Two - When a bunch of cops are murdered by way of having their tongues removed and the assailant is described as a dog-faced boy, Joshua comes under suspicion.

11.08.2001
11.12.2001
B-

Kim

2-5
Recap

Shut up.

Boo - Shut up, Max. And Ebonics Barbie. And Head In A Bag. And Kitten With A Whip. And Lizardo. And Monsignor Bogtrotter. James Cameron? You can just drop dead. Jackass.

11.01.2001
11.06.2001

Demian

2-4
Recap

Radar Love

Radar Love - White hires a bio-terror expert to kill all of the escaped transgenics. Will Max be able to stop him in time? Meanwhile, Max and Logan can't figure out if they should date other people, because they never actually talk to one another about it.

10.25.2001
10.30.2001
C-

Kim

2-3
Recap

Proof Of Purchase

Proof Of Purchase - Max tries to help Joshua find his (their?) father, and also to find a cure for her virus so that she and Logan can swap spit again. Alec has problems of his own, including an explosive device in his head.

10.11.2001
10.14.2001
B-

Kim

2-2
Recap

Bag 'Em

Bag 'Em - Max tries to help the soldiers who escaped the burning Manticore before the mysterious Blackie can round them up again. Alec emerges as a comic sensation that should get his own show.

10.04.2001
10.08.2001
B-

Kim

2-1
Recap

Designate This

Designate This - Max busts out from Manticore, and makes a friend or two in the process. Or does she?

09.27.2001
09.30.2001
C

Kim

1-21
Recap

Family Feud

…And Jesus Brought A Casserole (2) - There's a hootenanny a-brewin' as the X5s have yet another family reunion. Fights break out over who ate the last of the Jell-O salad and who finished off the bucket of Colonel's Extra Crispy; other than that it's a gay old time. But who invited Lydecker? And why are all the mini-Maxs and mini-Zacks running around with guns? And who let Jessica Alba's brother on the air? At least Louis Anderson stayed out of this one.

05.21.2001
05.27.2001
B-

LuluBates

1-20
Recap

MEOW (1)

MEOW (1) - Max goes into heat, which means she has to dis Logan on their anniversary and sleep with the pizza delivery boy. Oh, and there are lots of developments on the whole Lydecker/Madame X front too.

05.14.2001
05.16.2001
B

Kim

1-19
Recap

Sister Sister

Hit A Sista Back - Max has to save yet another member of her extended Manticore family. This time it's her "sister," Tinga, who has gone on the run from her husband and child with Lydecker right on her tail. Amid the actiony action, there's time for lots of talk about family values, the nontraditional family, plenty of tears, happy reunions, and girl talk. All of which begs the question: Would this show be any less annoying if it starred Tia and Tamara?

05.07.2001
05.08.2001
B

LuluBates

1-18
Recap

Kodak moments

I And I Am A Camera - Some guy with a camera and superpowers is stalking Max. Or is he? And what does Cap'n EO's family fortune have to do with it?

04.30.2001
05.02.2001
C-

Kim

1-17
Recap

You gotta have faith-a faith-a faith

Pollo Loco - Max and Captain EO go on a little date to church. And even then, under the altar of our Holy Father, Captain EO still won't get rid of that goddamn perma-stubble. For the love of God, leave the faith to George Michael and go home and shave!

04.23.2001
04.30.2001
B

LuluBates

1-16
Recap

Shorties In Love

Shorties In Love - OC's ex-girlfriend comes back, fresh out of prison. Meanwhile, Max is stealing some disks for EO from a rich guy. Those two storylines intersect, and end with death and poetry.

04.16.2001
04.17.2001
C-

Kim

1-15
Recap

The hills are alive with the sound of yawning

Haven - Max and Cap'n EO head out of town for a little rest, relaxation, and camp food, but they get sidetracked into graverobbing, murder, and small-town intrigue. It sounds a lot more interesting than it is. No, really.

03.26.2001
04.01.2001
C-

LuluBates

1-14
Recap

Female Trouble

Female Trouble - An X5 named Jase is trying to kill Cap'n EO's doctor, but Max manages to turn Jase around and ship her off to Mexico. Except the doctor dies. But she was evil anyway.

03.12.2001
03.17.2001
C-

Kim

1-13
Recap

Brains for dinner, brains for lunch, why can't we have some guts guts guts?!

The Kidz Are Aiight - Welcome to Episode Thirteen. In which Zack reveals that he has got zombie DNA that can kick Max's feline DNA's ass. In which the laws of physics are bent to the breaking point. In which there is no kissing, no romantic dinners, no realistic time frames, and no Jam Ponies.

02.19.2001
02.27.2001

Amorgan

1-12
Recap

Slip and fall and hurt my head

Rising - The Red Series South African Hit Squad is on the scene again, but unfortunately, they fail to harvest Max's ova or kick her ass. What a disappointment! To make up for that shortcoming, the writers decided to try placate us with feeble but well-intentioned attempts at continuity, clarity, and the occasional explanation of impossible occurrences. Maybe Max will get her ass kicked next week if I play nice with the writers.

02.12.2001
02.19.2001
C+

LuluBates

1-11
Recap

Love and Marriage Go Together Like a Horse and Glue Factory

Art Attack - There's art theft. There's a wedding. There's a lot of talk about the nature of love and marriage. Very un-deep talk that would probably make Linda Hamilton pop a vein if she were watching. And, like I said, there's Max, naked in a dumpster. You'll love it.

02.05.2001
02.09.2001
F

Amorgan

1-10
Recap

Holier than thou

Red - Max and Cap'n EO save some old scum of the earth so that he can testify against the mayor, and they feel really good about themselves for doing it. They feel so good about themselves for doing it that they talk about how great they feel the WHOLE. FREAKING. EPISODE.

01.15.2001
01.17.2001
B-

LuluBates

1-9
Recap

It's a shame about Ray

Out - Actually, it's not, but I really wanted to tie in that Lemonheads song somehow. See, Ray is Normal's secret name. And he falls in love, kind of. And I actually like him in this episode. Everyone else does a Riverdance all over my nerves, as usual, what with ruminations on the nature of gender, thoughts on love, bad cat-burgling, and improbable feats of both logic and logistics. Also, I have poison ivy all over my arms and I am worried that I've accidentally spread it to my neck. Yuck.

01.08.2001
01.15.2001
F

Amorgan

1-8
Recap

Hot patootie

Blah Blah Woof Woof - Lydecker continues his hot pursuit of Max and manages to scare her out of town, but not for long, since Max is determined to act on her Electra complex. Or was that Zack's Oedipal complex? Or was it my gag reflex? Read 'em and weep.

12.11.2000
12.17.2000
D

LuluBates

1-7
Recap

Blood is thicker than water. But what does that mean, really?

Cold Comfort - Max gets to confront Lydecker. Zach gets to smack Lydecker around. Zach and the Cap'n get to throw static at one another. Sketch gets a respectable businessman to admit to sleeping with two chicks at once. And Normal gets the shits. It's a laff riot. It's comedy, it's drama ­- but is it a dramedy? It just may be.

11.27.2000
11.30.2000
C-

Amorgan

1-6
Recap

He said, she said...I said shut. Up.

Prodigy - There's a war a-brewin' at the Halls of Justice as Captain EO and Max's relationship devolves into an eternal I'll Save The Day/No, I'll Save The Day back-and-forth. Now if only the writers would save my day and kill off one of them. And I don't mean the one on wheels.

11.20.2000
11.26.2000
D

LuluBates

1-5
Recap

How to Make an Actor from Common Household Materials

411 On The DL - Step One: Take an old piece of wood. A two-by-four will do. Step Two: Draw a face on it with a Sharpie marker. Glue pink marshmallows on for lips if you want to make a Hot Babe Actor. Step Three: Make a tape recording of your favorite child reading a Dark Angel script. Tape the cassette player to the two-by-four, then press "play." Voila! Your very own actor, for a fraction of the price that "real" actors cost! You'll win that Emmy for sure this time.

11.13.2000
11.20.2000
D

Amorgan

1-4
Recap

ZZZZZZzzzzzz...

C.R.E.A.M. - The writers decided to give themselves a vacation this week and have the new Microsoft scriptwriting software write the episode for them, with all the plot techniques that keep your audience begging for more. You've got your dysfunctional family. Your brief nudity. Your fight scenes. Your developing love interest. Your Russian gangsters. Your girls dressed like hookers. But wait, what's that sound? It's Lulu, sawing logs.

10.30.2000
11.04.2000
D

LuluBates

1-3
Recap

Take My Tryptophan, Please

Flushed - Whaddya get when you cross a genetically-engineered super-being, a glass of milk, a guy in a wheelchair, and a lesbian hooker? Why, mayhem, of course! You what I really missed in this episode, though? The motorcycle. I wonder if it's taking some personal time to attend to its private life, the life that every star lives off-camera, the life it had before it became a television star. Fame has its price, my friends. Oh, yes. Fame has its price.

10.16.2000
10.22.2000
D

Amorgan

1-2
Recap

Cat Scratch Fever

Heat - Max's feline DNA gets her all hot and bothered. Mothers, lock up your Captain EOs! Oh, and didn't Max have a motorcycle or something last week? Because it doesn't show up in this week's episode. Oh, wait. It does. Forty thousand times.

10.09.2000
10.14.2000
D

LuluBates

1-1
Recap

Witchblade Runner

Pilot - She's pneumatic, mnemonic, she's got a wicked bike and puffy lips -- is there anything Max can't do? Forget her past, maybe.

10.02.2000
10.05.2000
D

Amorgan

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