Previously on DC: Pacey admits that Bessie thought up the bed-and-breakfast, but takes credit for telling her how to do it "for next to nothing"; Dawson tells Joey that The Flashes have finally divorced; while Henry strums his guitar, Jen says that she doesn't know "what it's like to completely lose yourself in somebody else"; Pacey bitches Dawson out for not thinking that another guy would come along and show an interest in Joey one day.
Fade up on The Big Chill. As Mary Beth Hurt and Tom Berenger cut a rug onscreen, Joey "Serial Mom-Mentioner" Potter snorts derisively and observes that "nobody dances in the kitchen." Dawson "Imagine There's No Forehead / It's Easy If You -- Oh, Wait, It Isn't" Leery, slumped on a couch, says that maybe their parents danced in the kitchen, and goes on to say that his parents love The Big Chill, and that it's the definitive movie of the entire baby-boom generation. Twenty-two seconds into the episode, I tell Dawson to shut up for the first time. Shut up, Dawson. Joey takes the popcorn bowl from Pacey "Hey La, Hey La" Witter, who has popcorn jetsam all over the front of his sweatshirt, and asks if his parents dance in the kitchen, and he repeats incredulously, "My parents?" and says no, they definitely don't. Dawson defends his choice of The Big Chill by saying that he took all the posters off of his walls, "everything's in question," so he thought he'd try something new for Movie Night. Joey moves to turn the TV off, sniping, "Oh, so we're scaling new heights of Mount Lame," and Dawson tells her that he intended the night's activities to calm her nerves, "not agitate them," and Joey grouses, "Well, that's impossible. I mean, this bed-and-breakfast has been open for a day -- a very costly bed-and-breakfast, mind you -- and there are no guests!" She adds that the reservation list has no names on it, either. Dawson correctly points out that it takes time to establish a reputation, and Joey, near tears, snarls that she and Bessie have sunk their every dime into the place, and "along with guests, time is another thing we don't have." Just then, the phone rings, and Dawson and Pacey give Joey "see, just relax" looks; Joey smiles and goes to answer the phone, but it's a telemarketer, and when she tries to turn the tables and invite the telemarketer to stay at the B&B, the telemarketer hangs up on her. Like, ha ha. Not. Pacey tells her to "keep the faith," and Joey asks accusingly if that's all he has to say, "considering that you were the primary force that escorted Bessie and I [sic] down this road to economic ruin?" Get off it, Joey -- I for one don't doubt that Bessie would have told Pacey to get bent if she thought you'd lose money on the idea. Pacey tries to defend himself by saying he only found a way to "kick in some free labor," but Joey keeps strumming the oh-woe-is-me chord, blaming him for the whole "pipe dream" and using the word "bereft" incorrectly. Pacey rolls his eyes just as we hear a knock at the door. Once again with the "see, just relax" looks and the relieved smile from Joey, but once again, the much-needed guests don't materialize -- Joey whips open the door on a pair of Jehovah's Witnesses, one of whom hands her a tract as Joey glares over her shoulder at a laughing Pacey. Does the fun ever start?
New credits, same old cat-undergoing-acupuncture theme song.