Last week, Pacey admitted to an unconscious Joey that he'd never gotten over her, and they kissed. Millions of Joey/Pacey 'shippers all over North America found strange, high-pitched noises coming out of their mouths for the first time in years.
We open at some formal event. I try and read the posterboard propped outside of the ballroom, but all I can see is, "Fifth Annual Dinner and Ball." Let's call it The Finally Giving Them What They Want Ball. We pan past an ice sculpture of a swan and into the ballroom. Cole Porter's "You Do Something To Me" plays on the soundtrack. I love that song, so this puts me in a very good mood right off the bat. We finally arrive at Pacey's table. He's sitting between Joey and some blonde chick. The three of them are talking, but the blonde is certainly paying more attention to Pacey than she is to Joey. And Joey looks a bit bored, although she seems to be playing the good sport. We cut to underneath the table. Joey's taken off her strappy sandals, and one of them has somehow migrated out of the reach of her toes. She stretches and struggles, but she can't reach it with her foot. Pacey keeps flirting with The Blonde, as Joey contorts herself, trying to snag her shoe. The Blonde laughs and laughs and laughs and laughs at Pacey. Finally, Joey has to slide off her chair and crawl get under the table to grab her shoe. Underneath there, she looks over and sees The Blonde's hand resting on Pacey's upper thigh. She starts, and her head hits the table. Above board, the glasses and silverware jump. "Excuse me for a minute," Pacey says, and turns to Joey, who's emerged looking flustered. Bad cut here; during the shot of Pacey and The Blonde reacting to the jostling silverware, both her hands were on the table, when one of them was supposed to be on his leg. Someone fell asleep in the editing bay there.
Anyway, Pacey puts a fraternal arm around Joey. "Darling, I don't mean to pry, but would you mind telling me what the hell it is you're doing down there?" he asks. Joey asks if he'd mind telling her what the hell "that girl's hand is doing knee-deep on [his] lap?" Pacey makes a face -- perhaps at her bizarre use of the phrase "knee-deep" in this instance -- and plays dumb. "You heard me. Or perhaps you'd like me to involve the entire table. I'm sure her date would be at least marginally interested," Joey snaps. Pacey asks what her point is, exactly. Joey whines that she wants to go home. "I'm tired. I'm cranky. And I know you didn't read the fine print in our little rent-a-date contract, but it expires in exactly thirty-five minutes, so maybe you should just skip the subtleties and get her phone number?" Pacey rolls his eyes. "Okay, sis," he says, very loudly. Joey's jaw drops. "She thinks I'm your sister?" she yelps. Pacey takes a nearby fork and tosses it on the floor. "Whoops!" he says, and bends down to pick it up, drawing Joey down with him. He asks if she remembers the part about how this is a good networking opportunity for him. Joey hisses that he bamboozled her into going with him in the first place. "But you know what? We've networked. We've schmoozed. And unless you take me home now -- as in right now -- I think Little Miss Thing over there isn't going to be so interested when she sees your sister lean over and give you the tongue-kissing of your life." Pacey blinks. "Five minutes," he promises. Joey thanks him.
Pacey turns back to The Blonde and assures her that everything is okay. "Sisters!" he says, faux-exasperated. The Blonde smiles flirtatiously. "Yeah, and the guy I'm with is my brother," she twitters. Joey's crawled back under the table to get her shoe. Pacey wonders if he could call The Blonde sometime, and The Blonde purrs that he can, or they can ditch their dates, meet back in an hour, and go back to her place. Pacey blinks again, thrilled by his good fortune. "Unless you're really with that girl," The Blonde coos. "That girl?" Pacey parrots. "The one under the table?" The Blonde reminds him. Pacey assures her that he is most assuredly not with Joey. They agree to meet back in an hour. Joey finally climbs out from under the tablecloth, complaining that somehow, her shoe got all the way across the table. Pacey blusters that they can totally go now, and pulls Joey out of her chair before she even gets her shoe back on her foot. He drags her though the ballroom. "Come on, Cinderella," he says. Joey stumbles along behind him and wonders if he's got a "hot date" or something. "No, but a hot woman did just offer to have sex with me, no strings attached," he says. Joey rolls her eyes. "You're so cute when you're delusional," she snarks, as they trot out of the ballroom and right into the credits.