Dawson's Creek
Gossip

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Back on the bed with Naomi, Beau resumes the make-out session. Naomi recites the blonde mating call: "I am so drunk." Hey, don't post angry comments. I didn't invent that joke, and she did actually say that line. Oil Derrick cracks the door open and plays Peeping Tom. We hear Naomi say, "Please, stop. Please," but we can't see what she means, and we cut away before we see whether or not Beau does as asked. Later, Beau comes sauntering down the stairs, and two skeevy guys ask him if he scored. He says a gentleman doesn't tell, which the guys take as a yes. He heads out. Meanwhile, Naomi is upstairs still, unconscious on the bed. Oil Derrick stands over her, watching her with a look that's rather, well, oily and unpleasant. We cut out to some street tunnel as the trio leaves the club. There are homeless people huddled around a burning trash barrel, as required by law in any movie scenes that take place in slum districts. Oil Derrick says he has a rumor for them to use as he tries to hail a cab. He asks Jones if she knows who Naomi is. Jones re-expositions Naomi's rich background for us, so she can add more anti-rich proletarian comments and state how much she hates her and rich people. But she adds that she likes Oil Derrick. Oil Derrick points out that he buys drinks for Jones, and Jones replies that she likes rich people who are nice to her. So Jones is a whore, then -- is that it? Despite her tirades against money, she's bought awfully easily, I'd say. A round of Manhattans? She's cheaper than most whores. In the background, an exceedingly drunk Travis is going through homeless people's belongings on the side of the tunnel. He pulls a blanket out of some trash can and takes it. Some homeless guy, who probably bathes more often than you do, is going to freeze to death tonight, you witless cretin. Put it back. Oil Derrick explains that he saw Beau and Naomi making out. Naomi blacked out, so Beau split. Jones points out that's not much in the way of gossip. Oil Derrick explains that whatever rumor they want to track will have to be made up, otherwise they won't be able to tell that it's theirs. He suggests spreading the rumor that Naomi and Beau actually did have sex. How these college-educated people, taking a class where they discuss the consequences of gossip, can fail to see how a rumor of two people having sex under the influence of alcohol can go horribly, horribly awry is beyond me. It's like their class project is to destroy two people's reputations. I don't need the creepy strings in the background music to telegraph to me that this is a bad idea. The badness of this idea is visible from Venus.

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Dawson's Creek

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