Dawson's Creek
Dawson's Creek

Episode Report Card
Wing Chun: D | 428 USERS: C+
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High Risk Behavior

Dawson scoffs, "It's not Joey!" Pacey says, "Right. That's not Joey, the guy's not you, and you're not dissecting you two's [sic] relationship on the page just like every other narcissistic writer through history." Dawson says again, "Tell me what you think," as if that isn't exactly what Pacey has been doing for the past three minutes, ass-munch. Pacey says, "I think it's dark. It's obtuse. ["Obtuse. fig. Not acutely affecting the senses; indistinctly felt or perceived; dull." -- OED] It's very un-Dawson Leery." Having finally goaded Pacey into giving the answer he was waiting for (and not, evidently, perceiving the insult of having his writing described as "obtuse"), Dawson smirks and says, "Thank you," and then gets up and crosses the room, allowing the camera to pass behind yet another lamp. WHY? Dawson continues: "This is the first time I've been able to write something that's not only plot-driven, but also emotionally-driven." Uh, Dawson, you better put your horn away before your tooting causes your lungs to collapse. Pacey says, with evident boredom, "Congratulations. You're evolving as an artist." Dawson sits down at his computer, immensely pleased with himself. "All right. It's about time I took some risks, you know? Ride the edge a little." My God, REIN IT IN, David Lynch, before your head grows any larger! Pacey, in an attempt to deflate said noggin, says, "Well, if that's the case, I do have one note." "Which is?" replies Dawson warily. Pacey says, "Why don't they have sex?" Dawson rolls his eyes. Pacey continues: "I know you and Joey never did in real life, but this is a film; you can write it any way you want. You know? Take the risky plunge." Dawson turns on him: "Ah! See, I have. How many movies do you see where a bunch of horny teenagers just go at it like rabbits [shout-out to the plot of this episode]? Huh? I mean, that's the safe choice. The risky, edgier choice is to have them not do it." Dawson settles back to smirking despite the fact that he's using the words "risky" and "edgy" like an ad executive. Hey Dawson, how about combing that prodigious vocabulary for some words that have actual meanings? Pacey says, "Only you would take your virginal insecurities and your fear of deflowerment and turn them into 'risky, edgy' behaviour." Go Pacey! Dawson protesteth too much: "Oh yeah. I have no problem being a virgin [as Paula Cole's ululations swell in the background]. I'm sorry if my confidence in my convictions discombobulates you." "'Dis-com-bob-u-late,'" says Pacey. "How many syllables is that?" Dawson whips the script at him and we cut to the opening credits. This paragraph has been brought to you by Sayings of tm Sars.

Dawson's Creek

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