He goes into his office and starts playing with his balls. Oh, man! That joke was really bad. I'm so sorry. It's one of those desk toys with all those hanging ball things, and you move one and they all swing back and forth? Oh, you know what I mean. Joey tells him that it's his "office-warming gift." He thanks her, and Joey smirks that she's "the best assistant ever." Pacey agrees, but nicely tells her that she forgot to make the coffee. "Well, you were a chef, right? You can make it yourself," Joey chirps. Except for the part where it's, you know, your job, Josephine. Pacey just agrees, though, and hands her a file to take to "Tom." Joey? You're an assistant. Sometimes, assistants make coffee. You know what else? I'm not an assistant, and sometimes I make coffee. People want coffee. The coffee must be made. And, um, you're a waitress. Surely you don't find serving beverages inherently distasteful. As she leaves, Bobby Briggs slithers in and drools that he doesn't think Pacey ought to look for a replacement for Joey. Pacey informs Bobby that, first of all, Joey is in school, and second of all, she's "unavailable." Bobby just smirks. "She's my friend, which makes it a little awkward in telling her what to do," Pacey finally admits. Outside, Joey slides back into her seat, just in time to overhear Bobby Briggs telling Pacey that he's being interviewed that day by "some chick from the financial section." Apparently, this "broad" is particularly interested in Pacey's rapid rise to the top. Bobby then leaves, just so Joey can come in and announce that it's part of her job to eavesdrop, and then passive-aggressively make semi-jealous comments about this reporter woman. She's a REPORTER. It's her JOB to interview people. It doesn't mean she wants to bone him, Joey.
Boston Bay College. Jen catches up with Blandy, who's getting some coffee from a kiosk. She asks if he got her one; he didn't. "Way to be a boyfriend," she snarls. "Yeah, right, good one, Jen," Blandy says quietly. Man, Michelle Williams has gotten skinny. She looks like she's going to blow away. Jen awkwardly attempts to make small talk, wondering if the "C" in "CJ" stands for "crabby." She then wonders what's wrong with him. Is she deranged? Blandy informs her that he doesn't like her using their problems in the bedroom to help people. "Well, first of all, I wasn't aware that we had problems in the bedroom," Jen begins. I just paused the tape here, and Blandy and I have the exact same expression on our faces: totally furrowed brows. DOES JEN HAVE AMNESIA? She just told the poor schmo on the helpline that she does!
"Second of all, why not?" she asks. Because it's personal, you twit! It's no one's business, and it's bad form. The people who call the helpline don't care about your problems. That's not why they're calling. "Wait, is this about sex?" she finally asks him. Jen apparently was abducted by aliens, because how could she not know that? "Pretty much, yeah," Blandy says. "Look, if what you told me about your past is true, then I guess what I don't understand is why the creeps and scumbags who treated you so poorly got the benefit of your sex drive and guys like me, who actually treat you fairly well, we get ridiculed for wanting to have sex with you," he tells her, not unkindly. Jen blinks. "Wow, kudos to you, [Blandy]. That is the nicest way that anyone's ever called me a slut," she says. Again, Blandy and I make the exact same incredulous face. Jen has clearly seen her own haircut and had a psychotic break, because that was so not Blandy calling her a slut. He simply pointed out that he doesn't understand why she apparently enjoyed sex with guys who were shitty to her, but she doesn't enjoy sex with a guy who actually likes her. Blandy, newsflash: it's because she's got some issues. "Basically, what you're saying is, if I can be slut for other guys, why can't I be a slut for you?" Jen asks, then stomps off, as Blandy calls after her that he didn't say that at all. Oh my God! I haven't been this angry about this show in years! First of all, the word "slut" was never mentioned, and Blandy has never, in my memory, said that Jen's "past" -- and let's not even get into how fucking vanilla her "past" actually is -- bothers him or is in any way what he would consider promiscuous. Second, since when is hoping that your partner will have sex with you more than once a week asking her to "be a slut" -- whatever that means? Not that people are required to have sex some arbitrary number of times a week, but having desiring your partner in no way makes them -- or you -- morally destitute. Jen seems to think that if she enjoys sex with her boyfriend, that makes her some kind of whore, when actually, it just makes her you know, normal and healthy. God! The way relationships -- especially sexual ones -- are presented on this show just makes my blood boil. Boil, I tell you!