Meanwhile, in Boston, Pacey's at work, doing his usual wheeling and dealing. He soon, however, gets a phone call that sounds more personal than professional. "Okay, what hospital are you guys at? I'll be there soon," he asks. And I'm so happy about the new haircut that I'm not even going to complain about the fact that Pacey just ended a sentence with a preposition.
Cut to Capeside General, where Deputy Doug leans against a counter, perturbed and balding in his uniform. Pacey rushes into the hospital, looking suave and professional in his posh overcoat. Doug tells his brother that their father is up and walking, and that they've taken him for some tests. He tries to continue with his Hey, Dude, Our Dad Is In The Hospital story, but Pacey is too busy wondering why Pa Witter isn't ensconced in a private room. Doug stammers that all the private rooms were full, as Pacey, um, paces and wonders about his father's tests. Doug tells him that Pa Witter didn't have a heart attack, just an "exaggerated arrhythmia." He admits that he doesn't know much about the medical terminology. "Well, who can I talk to around here who does know what the hell they're talking about?" Pacey snaps. Doug looks hurt. That line looks much meaner typed out than it actually sounded; it's pretty obvious that Pacey is just being snappish because he's worried and scared. Doug passive-aggressively sniffs that he's been somewhat busy, trying to keep their family from falling apart. Pacey retorts that he would have been there to help a lot sooner if someone had called him sooner, and Doug snaps that he didn't have a lot of time for phone calls, what with the whole rushing their dad to the hospital thing, and he's really sorry that things aren't up to snuff for "the Wall Street wannabe," but he's been busy concentrating on "more important things, like the fact that [Pa Witter] survived!" Pacey just stares at his brother -- possibly wondering why Doug is wearing so much eyeliner -- as he stomps away.
Over at the high school, Dawson shows the class The Worst Movie Ever Made. They clap as the credits roll, and Dawson wonders if they have any questions. Some guy points out that our beloved missing-in-action Todd directed the movie, rather than Dawson, and Dawson sputters that he actually got to direct the ending. A nerdy kid who might as well be wearing a shirt that reads "Dawson Part Deux" points out that Todd is best known for directing "gratuitous fleshy music videos," whereas Dawson is "more of a sentimental realist." Dawson furrows his not inconsequential brow. "Is that the word on the street?" he asks. Mel Silver explains that he showed the class some of Dawson's "early work," for "a little compare and contrast." Dawson II asks if Dawson had to struggle not to put too much of himself into Todd's movie. I know there's a dirty Todd/Dawson sex joke in there somewhere, but I just can't find it. That's what happens when you've got a month between recaps: you lose your ability to make juvenile cracks. Dawson explains that because he spent so much time (in bed) with Todd, they eventually had "a shared vision" for the ending. Dawson II wonders if that's such a good thing, seeing as the movie went straight to cable. Dawson just laughs, and somehow this strays into a conversation about how Woody Allen and Dawson both dropped out of film school, and let me assure you, Dawson, you are no Woody Allen.