Dawson's Creek
The All-Nighter

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Sars: D | 1 USERS: A+
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The All-Nighter

Fade up on a teacher droning "what light through yonder window breaks" as Dawson doodles on the school-logo pirate on his notebook, and if the writers try to fob off that exhausted "Romeo and Juliet" parallel on us, I don't know what, but the teacher redeems himself by continuing, "It is the midterm, and your impending failure is but hours away." The midterm will cover everything they have learned about English literature thus far and will count for half their grade. Meanwhile, Andie "Dexatrim" McPhee and Pacey "Half" Witter giggle at each other, and Dawson and Joey "Madame Tussaud's" Potter almost bump heads while reaching for their books in a moment of awkwardness, and Joey has some sort of not-swept and not-up swept-up hairdo going on, and Napoleon explains to the other animals why throwing over the farmer -- oops, my bad, Jen in a slinky red top sulks at her desk, and then some guy in the back of the classroom throws a balled-up piece of paper at her which says "DON'T FORGET TO SMILE!" with "SMILE" all underlined, like, shut up, guy in the back of the classroom, and also, stop letting your mother cut your hair. Jen sort of reluctantly turns around to smile at Mental-Patient-Haircut Boy while the teacher announces the study session, which he suggests that everyone attend, "unless of course your parents have dedicated at least a wing or two to an Ivy league institution, in which case your tragic East Coast aristocratic social-alcoholic fate has already been sealed," and speaking of alcoholics, this teacher seems to have hit the bottle of Jim Beam in the teachers' lounge pretty hard. The bell rings, and Joey follows Dawson out of the room, telling him that at some point they should say something to each other, and Dawson asks, "What would you like me to say, Joey?" and Joey says, "I don't know -- what do you want to say?" and Dawson says, "'Go away'?" and Joey says, "Besides that?" Dawson says that she wanted space and he is giving it to her, but Joey didn't think they "would be cutting off all communication," and Dawson wants to know what she thought it meant, and Joey objects, "This isn't fair!" and Dawson wonders, "To which one of us? You can't make up all the rules," and Joey says she doesn't want to do that, although it seems pretty clear that she really does (and has), and Dawson asks what she does want, and once again a crowd of their peers has gathered to watch their non-argument argument, and Dawson stomps off down the hall. Number of retinal burns induced by James Van Der Beek's dye job: 12.

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Dawson's Creek

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