Chung-chung over to Joey's palatial -- and unrealistically well-decorated, with framed prints and full beds and matching duvet covers and embroidered pillows and fresh flowers -- dorm room, where she's hitting the books and trying as hard as she can to have absolutely no fun. The door opens, admitting Joey's roommate (played by Busy Philipps, a.k.a. Kim from the late and much lamented Freaks and Geeks). Joey's nice enough to give her a name, "Audrey," right off the bat, so I don't have to give her some long awkward acronym. Audrey pleadingly asks Joey to "do her a favor." Joey grimaces. "As long as it doesn't involve me leaving this room," she snips. Briefly; is it me, or is Joey just about the crabbiest college freshman ever? All last year, she was completely stressed about getting out of Capeside and into college, and now she's there and she isn't enjoying it at all. Not to sound like someone's mom or anything, but, seriously? College is fun. Enjoy it while you can. And clean your room. Audrey just looks at Joey, all puppy-dog eyes. "It involves me leaving this room, doesn't it?" Joey asks. But, see, Audrey's got this really cute boy waiting outside, and…Joey rolls her eyes. "The one with the tattoo of his frat on his ankle?" she asks. Audrey, who's touching up her make-up at her dressing table (she has a dressing table? In her dorm room? Sweet Christ), rolls her eyes. "No, that was Tom," she explains, and tells Joey that she and poor Tom are finito. Tom, it appears, is "a bad kisser. HOB." Joey raises her brows questioningly. "'Hair On Back.' Gross," Audrey translates. Joey seems to have left her sense of humor in Capeside -- or, you know, back in 1998 -- and wonders glumly if Audrey is aware how much time she -- Joey -- has spent "sexiled" in the library this semester. Please don't think that I don't sympathize with Joey's predicament here. My roommate freshman year was really, really nuts. And she had this horrible Axl-Rose-Meets-Truckstop-Transient type boyfriend, and they were always having sex in our tiny little room, and then eating fried chicken and leaving the carcass on the carpet -- literally, on the carpet, not even on a plate -- and it was horrible, but Delilah (her real name!) was crazy and horrible all over the place (she used to change her tampons in the room! I know!), whereas Audrey is fundamentally very likeable. Besides, doesn't Joey have any other friends in her dorm? When Delilah would kick me out, I'd crash with one of my friends on our floor. Surely, at the very least, Joey could go over to Jen's and let Grams feed her the milk and cookies she obviously needs, both for her personal happiness and because she could cut someone with that collarbone.