Dawson's Creek
The Kids Are Alright (1)

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Jessica: C+ | Grade It Now!
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Hysterical Blindness

Isn't this episode over yet? I think I just entered menopause. Over at the jukebox, a drunken customer is giving Emma lip. She's handling herself just fine, although, honestly, I don't care if this customer kidnaps Emma and sells her to the Sultan of Brunei at the end of the episode. Actually, that would be pretty interesting. Joey watches Emma tell the guy to shut his yap. "What are you looking at?" Drunkard asks Joey snippily. "Drunk guy with his fly open. What are you looking at?" she retorts. The Drunkard stumbles off, leaving Joey to yammer with Emma about the horrors of waiting tables, all of which ends with Emma offering Joey a job at Hell's Kitchen. Joey isn't sure what to do, since she has the other job offer from Flip-Flops. "Think about it, Joey," Emma says. That Joey Potter! Everywhere she goes, someone wants to hire her! I'd make a snide comment about how no one ever got a job on the strength of her snide commentary, but once I was shopping at this very cool used furniture store here in Los Angeles with my friend Joe, and Joe said something snotty to me, and I made a very cutting comment in return, the strength of which led the owner to offer me a job right there on the spot. He said he liked my sass. I didn't take the job, as I was already employed at the scenic Lu Valle Commons Bookstore at UCLA, but it was nice to be asked.

Anyway. Back at the table, Pacey announces that he needs to take off, seeing as he has his job interview in the morning. Audrey snits that he's a total "amateur." Pacey reiterates that he's simply got to get some rest. Audrey informs him that if she was looking to hire someone, she'd prefer a man who came into the interview "reeking of booze and sex." Dude, what is up with Audrey? Ooooh, I've got it. I bet her father is married to his job and she's scared of ending up in a similar relationship. Have I watched a lot of TV or what? Anyway, Pacey is all, " I have to get some sleep." Audrey pouts that she doesn't like this new Pacey. At all! "What happened to the Pacey of yore?" she whines. I hate to say this, because I think Busy Philips is a doll, but Audrey has become really, really, really grating. Like, grow up, Princess. People have to be responsible sometimes. Like, for example, maybe I wanted to go to the movies today. But I have to write my recap. It doesn't make me boring. It means I need to work. That's life. "The Pacey of yore just drove 3,000 miles in three days. Aren't you tired? Don't you have classes tomorrow?" Pacey asks. Audrey pouts that she has her priorities! Jack and Jen look at their respective laps as Pacey leaves and Audrey looks at her plate.

Outside the bar, Pacey walks down the street. Audrey comes tripping out of the bar and comes after him. Pacey, irritated, wonders how many more times he needs to explain that he wants to go to sleep! Audrey, by the way, has either the biggest zit I've ever seen on this show right in the middle of her forehead or she's growing a horn. The make-up people didn't do much to cover it up, either way. She tells Pacey that, in a minute, he'll be sorry he was so mean to her. "And you're going to feel like a jerk and I want to save you that pain." She digs around in her pocket and comes up with a room key to the most "ridiculously expensive hotel in Boston." She thought they should spend the last night of their summer vacation in style, she says. Pacey smiles at her. "After all the Motel Sixes, I thought it might be a nice change of pace, Pace." The Promise of Hot Love in Hotel Room Music swells in the background as Audrey promises that she'll let Pacey rest. "No sexual misconduct. Just hardcore REM sleep," she says. Pacey grins. "You're right," he says. "I feel like a jerk." He apologizes, explaining that he just wants to make a good impression in his interview, especially since her father went to so much trouble to arrange it. "Pacey, you're getting all serious on me," Audrey complains, and kisses him. Pacey looks vaguely disturbed by this comment, but gets over it before she comes up for air and suggests they go "rest." Pacey offers that maybe he doesn't need to be quite so strict about the whole resting thing. They skip off. I give them three weeks.

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Dawson's Creek

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