Dawson's Creek
The Lost Weekend

Episode Report Card
Jessica: C | Grade It Now!
The Lost Weekend

Enter Audrey, clad only in a towel, combing her wet hair. She eyes the two of them, and wonders what the problem is. Joey stands up with her books, and she's wearing the lowest-cut jeans ever. I know that's the trend, and all, but dude, someone could lose an eye on those hipbones. If that person was, you know, like a midget or something. She complains to Audrey that it's Dunston's last day and she has to go drop a class. "Okay, that's a heartstopper," Audrey snarks, and suggests that Dawson entertain himself by taking a campus tour. "Perfect," Dawson says shortly. And Joey stomps out. "She's a handful, that girl," Audrey says, more to the closed door than to Dawson. Dawson rolls his eyes and shakes his head wearily, and I don't know what's wrong with me, but I sort of feel for him. Joey is a total pain in the ass. Also, as much as I hate to admit this, Dawson looks way better with the haircut. He seriously almost looks attractive. For, you know, a thirty-five-year-old man.

Cut to credits and commercials. Katie Holmes shilling for Garnier Nutrisse plus Joey tossing her razor-sharp pelvis all over the place is just overkill.

The streets of Boston. Jack and Jen walk around and talk about Charlie. Jen's insisting that he's never going to call her, pointing out that he doesn't have her phone number. Jack is absurdly confident, telling her that Charlie will get her number. He's very vague about how, exactly, Charlie will go about getting Jen's number. Maybe he'll use magic! Actually, Jack thinks Charlie will avail himself of recent "advances in informational technology." That's also known as "stalking," by the way. He just asks that when Charlie does track Jen down, she throw herself on him, since she "obviously wants to." We'll get back to Charlie in a sec, but I have to point out that Jen is wearing a really cute skirt. It's a black-and-white toile wrap-around with a pink tie/belt thing. I love and want it. ["Get in line. Wing Chun and I want it too." -- Sars] Jen informs Jack that "nice girls" don't throw themselves at boys they like. "Society deems that slutty and unattractive," she snarks. Jack snorts that he'd forgotten about that. As someone who's lived her whole life being the "nice girl," I'd just like to point out that, as a role, it's entirely overrated. Jack reminds Jen that she hasn't had sex in the entire time he's known her. Well, then, why did he say -- just last week -- that the last guy she'd been with was Henry? Or by "been with," did he just mean "date"? Because where I come from, it means something else. Jack also points out that, in the past year, he's kissed more boys than she has. "Well, that's not true," Jen sputters. "Okay, I've kissed one guy," Jack offers. "How many have you kissed?" Jack's hair is doing this distracting flippy That Girl thing right now, and it's so very wrong on a man. "One," Jen offers. "How many straight guys?" Jack presses. "Um, none," Jen flutters. Jack throws his arms up in a victorious gesture and darts across the street. "This is the saddest conversation ever," Jen sighs to herself, and trudges after him. Heh. These two are awfully cute. If only this were The Jen and Jack Show, With Special Appearances by Audrey and Charlie.

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Dawson's Creek




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