Okay, sidebar time. Yes, again. Just scan down if you don't care about all the brilliant points I'm going to make here. College can be a difficult adjustment. And sometimes, someone just leaving home for the first time will want to bail out and go back to the familiar confines of friends and family, because all that new independence is scary. However, generally, most people manage to work their way through that period of adjustment and enjoy themselves. Because college is as much about meeting new people and learning to get along with them as much as it is about learning and stuff. What was my point? Ah, yes: that Dawson is just homesick, and instead of crying about the posers in Los Angeles and how much he hates it, he ought to just tough it out a bit more and see how he feels after the semester is over. But who are we kidding? It's so obvious that they're setting it up for Dawson to drop out of USC and move to Boston. The show is called Dawson's Creek, after all. Sadly. Anyway, Audrey tells Dawson she's "worried about him." Dawson smiles sadly. "Well, thank you. I'm glad somebody is," he says. Oh, wah wah wah, little baby. Just because no one else cares if you're happy or not doesn't mean that nobody likes you…oh, wait.
Boston Skyline. We get it! We're in Boston! It's Boston! Cut to the Liberty Hall restaurant. I'm really surprised it's not named the "Boston Boston Boston Restaurant." Also, the more I type the word "Boston," the weirder it looks. Anyway, inside the café, the chef is outlining the daily specials to the wait staff -- all two of them. Does anyone really care about this Pacey/restaurant subplot? I mean, other than simply because it's Pacey-related? Thought not. The waitresses bitch to the chef, who takes it with a smile. One of the waitresses -- the bitchier one, in fact -- is the under-age college student who dated Carter on ER last season. Enter Pacey, looking for a "Danny Bresher." He doesn't notice, I suppose, that the chef is wearing a white coat with the word "Danny" embroidered flamboyantly across the chest. I'm beginning to see why Pacey didn't get into college. What? I can't make fun of Pacey every now and then? Nice, gentle, kind fun? I can't mock, because I love? No? Okay. Pacey tells Danny that he's there as a favor to his big brother. "You're Dougie's brother?" Danny asks. "Then you are the new dishwasher." Blah blah blah, here as a favor, yammer yammer, wash the dishes, blee blee blee, no interest in college, blah blah blah, let's just get Pacey into this stupid job and move on to his sure-to-be-irritating subplot for the year. The long and the short of it is that Pacey thinks he's too good to be a dishwasher, because he's a sailor! A really good sailor! "I'm sure in the middle of the ocean you're completely the bomb," Danny says, and for some reason, this line cracks me up. Pacey agrees that he is, in fact, the bomb. Danny nicely tells him that if he doesn't want the dishwashing gig, he's wasting everyone's time and should skedaddle. Pacey does.