Dawson's Creek
The Unusual Suspects

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Keyser Snore-ze

Jump cut to Dawson, saying more or less the same thing about Pacey -- that he's "not an idiot" and wouldn't jeopardize his precarious academic standing for a sub-par prank. Smalls thanks him. He leaves. The Flash asks if Smalls is "satisfied." Smalls is indeed satisfied, because he knows who did it. "Really?" The Flash asks, surprised. Smalls says loftily, "Obviously! Well, it's clear you don't watch Inspector Poirot on A&E." Heh. On the other hand, nobody watches that show. Smalls nods contentedly to himself as we fade out to commercial.

Back to the interrogation room, where Non-Liz Non-Claiborne is snipping that "there is neither rhyme nor reason that could account for" deducing that Drue masterminded Pooldoggate. Smalls says smugly that, if NLNC is finished, he'll tell her exactly how they know that Drue did it. Fish-eye lens shot of Drue in the hardware store as Smalls expositions that they know Drue bought a can of paint identical to the paint used to write "Class of 2001." Cut to Drue twirling The Flash's keys on his finger; Smalls expositions about that, too. Cut to a Sunset Boulevard-esque running-cam zoom up to Drue meeting the Witterbrüder at the boatyard, which makes him "conveniently present" at all the key crime-committing moments, and gives him "the means and resources" to "pull it all off, without a hitch." Smalls asks The Flash if he left anything out; The Flash, trying to contain his amusement at Smalls's pleasure in having pieced it together, says he thinks Smalls covered everything. "You conniving brat," NLNC spits at Drue, then grouses to Smalls, "I should have known after last year's ferret incident." Ha! Drue sighs noisily. Smalls and NLNC agree on two weeks' suspension and probation for the rest of the school year. Drue laughs in disbelief, and after Smalls reminds Drue that he has "a history" which has proven "to be quite telling," NLNC whaps Drue on the back of the head and orders him to get her purse, which makes him giggle even more. Heh. Reasonably funny scene, that.

In the hall, Drue huffily takes books out of his locker and stuffs them into his backpack as NLNC broods nearby. Joey wanders past, and Drue calls her over and tells her to tell "the boys" that he admires "the brilliance of their design." Then he changes his mind and tells her just to tell them "touché." He and NLNC head for the door; a puzzled Joey asks, "Which boys -- what happened?" "Karma," Drue shrugs. "Finally caught up with me." Oh, right. Like Drue would have such a moment of self-awareness. Whatever. NLNC drags him off.

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Dawson's Creek




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