Dawson's Creek
To Be Or Not To Be… (1)

Episode Report Card
To Be Or Not To Be... (1)

Tonight's episode is brought to us by the movie Blast from the Past, or as I like to call it, Dave Foley Pays Some Rent.

Over at the high school, Pacey is hailed by the guidance counselor, Mr. Milo. Pacey starts out on the defensive, saying, "Now, before you say anything, I want you to know I have the situation under complete control." Mr. Milo asks what situation that is. Pacey hesitates for a second, then answers, "Well, whichever of my academic improprieties you were about to make me aware of." Mr. Milo tells him, "'Improprieties' is the wrong word. Try 'kudos.'" He goes on to say that he just got the mid-term reports for all the students on academic watch: "And after removing my jaw from the floor, I came to see you." He hands Pacey a paper. "You posted three Bs, two As." Pacey is stunned by this news, and says, beaming, "That's impossible!" Mr. Milo allows, "One would think so," and smiles back just as broadly, causing Pacey to comment that he doesn't think he's ever seen Mr. Milo smile before. Mr. Milo tells him to keep up the good work. Aw.

Inside the school, Pacey comes tearing down the hall in jubilation, picks up Andie "Zagnut" McPhee and swings her around, ending by thrusting his tongue down her throat. Aw. Andie asks what that was for; Pacey says, "Just 'cause." Jack stands nearby watching this display, with his arms around Joey "La Barbe" Potter; he starts to nuzzle her as if planning to copy this move, but she laughingly rebuffs him, saying, "Don't even." Jack says, "What, we can't have a 'just 'cause'?" Joey says, "Sure, in private. But massive suck-face embraces are better left for bedrooms and private sunsets." Word, say I. Jack sighs loudly. Joey adds, "No offense," in the direction of Pacey and Andie, who answer in unison, "None taken." At that moment Dawson comes up behind Jack and after saying a very quick "hi guys" starts taking advantage of Jack's massive crush on him, asking when Jack might get a chance to work on the set for the pageant scene. Jack says he can do it this weekend if Dawson wants. Dawson says that's great and that he'll schedule the shoot for the weekend after, and takes off. Joey looks at Jack a bit quizzically but says nothing.

The bell rings. Pacey says he hates to be a stickler, but that they're late for "an hour of hell." As he starts to walk off, Jack says, "Yeah, you got your poem, stickler?" Pacey says he does. Jack gives Joey a brief kiss and follows Pacey. Joey walks over to Dawson's locker and says, "So! That was nice," referring to Dawson's ability to have a civil conversation with Jack, and expressing her surprise at it. Dawson says, "Some people are capable of moving beyond their longtime petty rivalries to a higher ground." Joey quite rightly answers, "Yeah right. If Jack wasn't [sic] doing your movie, he'd still be the enemy." Dawson says it's not true. Joey scoffs, "You are so Hollywood!" All I can say is that I'm glad she caught that, and saved me the trouble of pointing out Dawson's phoniness and his cynical use of Jack for his own purposes.

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Dawson's Creek




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