Over at the No-Fault Hacienda, Joey and Andie "Staying Fresh, Staying Cool" McPhee are walking across the lawn as some camera dude unloads equipment from a van. Jen walks out to greet them and thank them for coming. Joey takes this opportunity to get in a jealous dig at Jen: "Couldn't resist seeing the hot new producer in action." Jen has no response but to gaze at Joey in stunned silence as Abby "Lucci" Morgan comes out and makes some mantrap comment about the cameraman, prompting Andie to mutter, "Oh God, not you." Abby says, "Rude! Where's the love?" Andie rolls her eyes. The Bride of Flash comes up behind Andie toting a tripod and says, "We're going to get started in a minute. This was a great idea, Jen." This remark causes Joey to wheel around and glare squintingly at Jen, who deflates. The Bride of Flash adds, "It's going to be fun, don't you think?" Joey turns around and nods vigorously, then brushes past Jen into the house. Joey, are you familiar with the not-very-politically-correct expression INDIAN GIVER?
Back on the Witter Whaler, Jack comes out (hee!) with a fishing rod and affixes it, without much grace, to some kind of mounting thing at the stern of the boat. Dawson glares at him in stony silence throughout this operation. Jack decides to be the bigger man and try to start a dialogue with, "Guess my little secret's out." KR yells, "It's that you're gay!" Dawson scowls in Jack's general direction. Jack gamely tries again: "You can't exactly 'call me Ishmael.'" Still, Dawson is more interested in ignoring Jack and says nothing. Jack prompts him, "Get it? 'Ishmael'? Moby Dick?" Dawson stops squinting and scowling just long enough to grunt, "Yeah. Read it." Jack says, "Right," and turns away, adding, "Well, this is going to be a fun weekend." Dawson nastily asks, without looking at him, "So why'd you come, Jack?" Jack says, "Look, Dawson, I didn't realize you were going to be here. It's a little late for me to make an exit now, and, um, survive, so why don't you and I try to get over our little problem, here?" Dawson gets up and says, without convincing, oh, anyone, "There's no problem, Jack. I'm just amazed that you'd come. That you'd leave your girlfriend alone this whole weekend, this early on in your relationship while things are still new and vulnerable, and you're still trying to figure things out, because it's right about now that some new guy, some bumbling, naive artsy type is going to come along and steal her away right out from under your nose. And trust me, that sucks." First of all, Dawson, anyone can tell you that Joey was never under your nose. Under your thumb, maybe, but not your nose, unless you mean that in the sense of "looking down one's nose," which, as I recall, you were and remain fond of doing, which might have had more to do with Joey's flight from you than the proximity of another guy's open arms. Second, "bumbling, naive artsy type"? Better put those stones away before someone glances in the direction of your own glass house, Senor Spielbergo.