Dawson's Creek
Wonder Boys

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Boys in my hood
As they peruse the aisles, Douglas asks Tobey where he lives. Tobey says he's been living at the bus station. I've been to the Pittsburgh bus station, and the only thing living there are some strains of bacteria never before seen on this planet. Anyway, Douglas is shocked to learn that Tobey is homeless. Then he spots some baby toys and remembers Sara. Cut to the greenhouse. Douglas sneaks in and is in the process of leaving a note for Sara when she surprises him. They chat. "There's something I need to tell you," says Michael "Disclosure" Douglas. He tries to tell her about Poe, but he wimps out. She tells him that he needs to decide what they're going to do about the whole baby thing. Then she leaves him alone in the greenhouse. Back in the car, Tobey thinks she took it pretty well, and Douglas is forced to tell him that he couldn't break the news to her. He asks if Tobey feels like taking a ride, and he agrees. As they drive, Tobey tells all about his family. They live in some small town. Dad has cancer and works in a mannequin factory. Based on his wooden acting, Tobey might be his finest work. Tobey finally agrees to get high, and they share yet another joint. "These donuts are incredible!" enthuses Tobey, who is enjoying his first encounter with the munchies. Sadly, I get them even when I'm not high these days. He's also entranced by the ass-print on Douglas's hood. Anyway, they've come to The Departed Wife's childhood home, and Douglas tries to find a way in. Finally, he convinces Tobey to crawl through the doggie door and unlock the back door. Tobey takes forever to get through, and I marvel at the advanced level of computer animation that will be required to make an actor this blatantly uncoordinated into Spiderman. Once they get inside, Douglas tells him to make himself at home, and then goes upstairs to The Departed Wife's bedroom. Tobey plops down on the couch, and apparently the pot is making him think he's back on the Pleasantville set, because he clicks on a old black-and-white movie and starts watching. Since this is a Dawson's Extra, I'll point out that the movie he's watching actually provides ironic self-aware commentary on the proceedings at hand. Of course, Curtis Hanson and Michael Chabon have actual talent, so it's nowhere near as annoying as when Dawson does it. Upstairs, Douglas is in The Departed Wife's childhood bedroom. He picks up the phone to call Sara, and of course the phone is pink as well. Sara is justifiably upset to learn that he's at the wife's house. She tells him that he has to make his own decisions and then hangs up. At this point, The Returning Parents of the Departed Wife arrive. Tobey takes a drag on his joint just as they walk inside. I'm not sure who is more surprised to see whom. The Departed Wife's father is played by Philip Bosco, whom I remember as the anal-retentive bus driver from Quick Change, but whom you might remember as Cameron Diaz's father in My Best Friend's Wedding. He chats with Michael Douglas as he helps him bandage the dog bite on his ankle. Michael just wants closure with The Departed Wife, but since he can't even remember her best friend's name (Hint: It's not Julia Roberts), we realize that he was never a very good husband anyway. Through the window, we can see a dog outside sniffing at Douglas's trunk, presumably because he smells Poe. That's worth a subtlety point.

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Dawson's Creek

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