Dead Last
Death Is In The Air

Episode Report Card
Alex Richmond: C+ | Grade It Now!
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Look Out! This Plane Is Going to Zzzz!

We hear the end of a conversation that goes, "And that's why all Trans-Planet Airline pilots are urine-tested regularly." The little boy says, "Neat." This so wants to be, but is not, an Airplane! moment. The kid leaves and Scotty is all, the plane is gonna crash. And how does he know this? He works for McDonnell Douglas, and helped build this thing. He puts his hands on a console, and the plane veers and shakes. People in their seats scream. The pilots correct the error and yell at Scotty. The ghost says that Scotty should use the fact that they think he's crazy to his advantage. Scotty says that they have to take the plane off autopilot now! The pilots do, and suggest that he get back to his seat for the movie which is, what else, Who's the Mayor?, with the guess who, that's right, the fictitious, not-real person you can stop asking about on the boards because he isn't real and doesn't exist Jared Paul. As soon as Scotty leaves, the pilots flip the autopilot back on again.

Scotty -- not arrested even though he freaked out in the cockpit -- walks back to his seat, then stops and heads back into First Class. His sister Tracy is sitting there smugly. She showed him who does what she wants to do. He sputters and fumes until she calls out, "Waitress? This man is bothering me." Hee.

Light up on a SF club called the Bottom. Dennis, the Chickenshit Manager, is killing time with the sharky journalist lady because the band is late. She starts asking pointedly mean questions like, why is it that The Problem has missed 30% of their gigs in the last four months, and are they going to fire you once they get major label deals? Are you sure? You seem a little defensive. Dennis quavers himself into a lather and finally Jane and Yawn walk in. Yawn locks eyes with the journalist lady, coldly says, "Erica," and they have a moment. Of course, they've met before. And, you know, done it. Erica wrote a review of another band Yawn was in "a few years back. Didn't she mention it? How unlike her." Why are chicks attracted to Yawn and his nasty disposition? Oh right -- some people are fucked up and like to hang out with nasty people who have bad personalities and bad hair and other bad habits. My bad.

Jane is saying the kind of things you never read about bands because it's so trite. "We just write about whatever makes us mad or think is funny and put it to noise we like to make...." Yawn says it's a little more involved than that, but that he doesn't want to go into it. Duh. Duh infinity. Band interviews are so boring, usually. Erica asks who their influences are and Yawn harshly says, "Bands that I like." Oh, someone slap him. Dennis starts trembling in triple-time and goes out for some air. Good move, "manager."

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Dead Last

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