Dead Last

Episode Report Card
Alex Richmond: A | 532 USERS: C+
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Scotty is a bad mother -- shut your mouth!

With the Justice Dudes tailing him and kissing his ass ("Who'd a thought it. He's a talented guy. Guitarist, vocalist, federal agent..."), they all agree never to mention this again. "Deep cover, gentlemen," says Yawn. They stroll off in separate directions, and then some well-dressed fat men tackle Yawn and stuff him into the back of a town car. Sigh.

Yawn, open-mouthed, gets interrogated by the fatties. They are not Mob guys, but two of Chicago's biggest bad guys and corrupt cops. How did Yawn know the name. How. HOW! Lawyer Ghost appears and offers help. "Do not say you're FBI, they will kill you faster than you can imagine. Say you went to summer camp with little Sammy Carnowski. And say you heard the name back in Reno last summer." Yawn stammers out the info, so they decide to let "the boss" handle this.

The police records lady is pretty. Scotty says, "Fiiine." She softens like cream cheese when Scotty says he's a friend of TNT's, and then slaps his face. She says he probably had that one coming, and returns to her desk. With TNT feeding him lines, Scotty says she looks just like Chaka Kahn and that she "must have been a queen back in the day." Dude, she's hot now, and if she's even forty I'll eat my laptop. The flattery works, and she supplies an address where they can find Ramirez's car. Scotty calls her "my girl" and leaves. She makes a moue, satisfied.

Opera plays in a red-tableclothed dining room. Fat wiseguys sit at the table, playfully questioning Yawn. Lawyer Guy supplies all the answers, and they all work, keeping him alive for a few more moments. Steaks are summoned. One wiseguy looks at the other warningly. What? Pause. You remember what your doctor said. No animal fat? They change their order to grilled eggplant with bok choy. Yawn smiles weakly.

Drain knocks on a door. It opens, and it's the guy that played the hobo in Pee Wee's Big Adventure -- you know, the guy that sang "Jimmy Crack Corn" so horribly that it made Pee Wee jump off the train? I love that guy. He's Pops McNitty, and he "knew this day would come."

Dead Last

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