I Am Not the Fine Man You Take Me For

Episode Report Card
Al Lowe: B | Grade It Now!
I Am Not the Fine Man You Take Me For

In his room at the Bella Union, Cy rambles on about Joanie calling him the devil, or whatever, and generally wastes all our time. He clutches his Bible, though it surely burns him, while Leon and Con Stapleton, drugged and drunk, respectively, make idiots of themselves. When Andy Cramed walks in, Stapleton rushes to Cy's room. "Yes, Con?" Cy drones in a pure Boothe-ian tone. Con tells him that Andy is there to see him. "His blade sheathed?" Cy asks. Con says it appears to be. With clear eyes, Cy says to send him in.

Outside, Doc comes out to bring in Ellsworth. Charlie still waits for word of what's going on. He feels someone watching him and looks up to see Joanie in the window of...the Chez Amie? I'm not really understanding where Joanie is in this episode, ever. Sorry. She's...somewhere, looking out the window at Charlie.

Back in Cy's room, ol' Maybelline Tolliver is putting on a performance of a lifetime. Andy is there, and Cy goes through this whole shaking and quivering thing like he's feverish, asking if Andy's an apparition. Andy says he's come to ask forgiveness. I'd like to go through the whole thing, but it just is not important, honestly. Powers Boothe is great, but he's wasted on all this bullshit unless they're really trying to get the point across that Cy's evil is a cartoon compared with Al and Hearst And frankly, if they were going to pull Andy back into things with Cy, I wish they'd leave them as enemies, with Andy being a badass vengeful preacher, gunning for him all the way. Eventually, Cy pulls a gun on Andy, ostensibly to kill him, but this plan is bungled by the entrance of Leon. Andy ends up being way more embarrassed for Cy than afraid of him, and leaves Leon and Con to haul him up to watch the elections.

At the Gem, Al is having to explain to his team how taking them over to Hearst's wouldn't give the right impression to the big man. (Y'all, my crush on Adams has seriously reached Selleckian proportions. What is it? The stache? The eyes? The natty costuming? I love him.) Dan's the one pouting, now. "Know goddamn well Hearst is gonna have his second there," he says, "that sea-creature-looking cocksucker." Al says that Hearst would have it be known that Captain Turner is but a hefty steward of the household. Hee! Hefty! I wish he'd said "husky," but I'll take it. Dan points out that that steward has more than a dozen pelts on his belt. "Even so, Dan, Hearst's man has pretext for his presence," Al explains, taking a shot of whiskey. "You and the others don't, what with the olive branch I'll be bearing between my teeth." Also nervous, Adams asks if Al minds if they keep an eye on him from the Gem balcony. Al: "Not at all. Moment seems meet, blow me a kiss." He turns to leave but Dan, still reluctant to let him go, blocks him. "Excuse me?" Al says, and Dan begrudgingly stands aside.

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