Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 1 USERS: A+
"Where Are You Going? You Have No Pants!"
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!


Notwithstanding all the mistakes heretofore that we will learn about over the next hour, I can tell you Vivian made several mistakes during her last hours on earth. Such as 1) wandering into a New York City alley 2) in high heels, 3) clip-clopping slowly away when she is menaced, 4) without Mace or a handgun at the ready and then 5) getting into her car just as the mysterious person is approaching who 6) clearly bears her ill will, then 7) giggling and inviting the person out for a night of adventure. That's how girls end up dead, Vivian!


Vivian is dead. Discovered on the floor in an expensive hotel room, of an apparent overdose, beat all to hell. I told you, Vivian. I told you but you don't listen.


What if you could beat cancer without chemotherapy? Lyritrol, a revolutionary breakthrough in cancer treatment...

Board meeting, during which the board members sit around and talk about how their drug doesn't actually do this -- in fact kills people -- but that it's "testing really well" and that some studies show that it shrinks tumors, sure, whilst killing the people with the tumors. Head of the company Robert Bowers seems to have no problem with this, but he sure does have a problem getting interrupted by his assistant Hannah. And that's before he takes the call, which is that his troubled daughter Vivian is exceedingly dead.


His second wife, who is totally awesome, is at some kind of a doctor that we never figure out what kind, he seems to be many different kinds of doctor, but apparently none of them are the kind that is apprised of basic facts about his patients. To wit:

Doctor: "Let's schedule a mammogram and also, have you thought about getting a breast lift for old ladies?"
Sofia: "How fucking old you do think I am?"
(Hint: This information is in the file you hold in your hands, sir.)
Doctor: "I don't know, like 47?"

Sofia takes a call from her husband Robert Bowers, who has crawled onto a window seat the better to sniffle and sob fetally.

Robert: "She overdosed! They found her body!"
Sofia: "Jesus Christ, man. Pull it together. I'll take care of everything, you just continue to puss out."
Robert: "Can do."

Sofia: "First of all, fuck you I'm 44. Second of all, I have to take care of this stupid mess now. Still ruining my day from beyond the goddamn grave."

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