Deep End

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Tippi Blevins: B- | Grade It Now!
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Swimming With Sharks

Welcome to the show everyone is calling Grey's Anatomy With Lawyers. Is this unfair to The Deep End? Unfair to Grey's? Perhaps it's an even draw. Let's find out, shall we?

Several lawyer babies are being interviewed for first-year positions at the swanky Los Angeles firm of Sterling, Huddle, Oppenheim & Craft. The young hopefuls' names are helpfully displayed beneath their dewy faces, along with what law school they graduated from. There's Dylan Hewitt from Columbia, Addy Fisher from Case Western Reserve, Beth Branford from Stanford, and Liam Priory from Cambridge. Dylan and Addy are super gung-ho about truth and justice and helping people. Beth and Liam are also idealistic but more practical and personally ambitious, with Beth touting her family's legal pedigree and Liam admitting he wants to meet women. They're all in major debt for their educations, except Beth, whose family practically owns Stanford. Dylan, having apparently been offered a position, says he has to think about it. Finally we see who's been on the other end of interviewing process, and it's a slick little guy of 40 or so with hair that looks like it was carefully grown in a lab. He has a Southern accent that comes and go and I'll just get this one absurdity out of the way right now and tell you his name is Rowdy. He sells the opportunity to the newbies as a position of prestige, since they only accept four first-year associates to nurture and groom and call their very own. He looks immensely pleased with himself, so either the spray tan he's been sniffing has hit the pleasure center of his brain or the quartet have accepted their offers.

It's three months later, as the title card tells us. Dylan is just arriving at the firm and Clancy Brown's name comes up on the screen, making me clap dorkily for a moment. Rowdy intercepts him at the reception desk, annoyed that Dylan is ten days late. This is a shock to Dylan, who tries to show Rowdy a letter telling him to show up on the tenth, rather than the first of the month. Rowdy tears up the letter and warns the little guppy that he'll have to deal with the Prince of Darkness now. As Rowdy's little legs carry him off-screen, Dylan runs into Beth, who gives him a dose of Wake Up And Get Real. He shouldn't expect the nurturing he was promised; instead, the first-years are expected to "perform flawlessly." Speaking of performing flawlessly, Liam is in the office into which Beth and Dylan have just walked, where he's just about to get it on with Beth's secretary. His pants are down around his ankles, exposing him as a boxers man. Liam and his Australian accent shake hands with Dylan and only then does he pull his pants up. Hope you brought hand sanitizer with you, Dylan. Addy bursts into the office at this point, looking for help from Liam for something. She's introduced to Dylan. She worries about making a mistake on her brief and they all worry about the wrath of the Prince of Darkness.

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Deep End

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