Desperate Housewives

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The Most Shocking Episode Ever

Previously: Orson was a thief, and Bree didn't like it. Carlos hired his fat ex, so Gaby got Lynette a job spying on them. Edie dug into Creepy Dave's past and found out he had a daughter. Creepy Dave left to go hunting/murdering with Katherine and Mike.

We open with Creepy Dave reporting illegal hunting in the woods, apparently where they're going camping. He calls from a pay phone and disguises his voice. Mary Alice explains Creepy Dave's plan: to guide Mike and Katherine to a remote cabin. The next morning, he'd pretend to sleep as Mike and Katherine go hiking. Then he'd grab his "carefully hidden" gun (because guns are so easy to hide). He'd find Katherine and Mike, and shoot Katherine, breaking Mike's heart. The rangers would mention reports of illegal hunters in the area, so Creepy Dave wouldn't be found out. He'd drive Mike home, and enjoy his pain. [Trying not to giggle through the whole car trip, I'm sure. - Zach] Mary Alice tells us that Creepy Dave's plan was simple, but he was about to discover there's nothing simple about murder. As she says this, the newspaper guys fax the clipping about Mike not being charged in the Dashes' deaths to Edie.

Mary Alice goes on about the nasty shocks life's full of. Juanita rubs her feet on the floor and intentionally shocks Celia. Preston or Porter gives himself a little jolt by sticking a fork in a toaster. Mrs. McCluskey has some sort of electrical short while she's vacuuming. Susan sees Karl in the hall at her school. Apparently he's enrolled his son, Evan, at the school, and she tells him she's an art teacher. (Which she isn't, though, right? She's an assistant, no?) Karl introduces Evan and Susan by being mean to Susan, as usual. Susan sends Evan away and tells Karl she doesn't need two ex-husbands running around the halls, so he needs to pretend they don't know each other. He makes a crack about banging her erasers after class, so she tells him she has a yardstick and isn't afraid to use it. I think this is actually their version of flirting. It's sort of appropriate, since they're in an elementary school, I guess.

At the office, Fat Lucy rants about something about business and success, and then breaks off to yell at Lynette for touching one of her figurines. It's a little glass sculpture that Lucy says is worth more than Lynette's house. Lynette doesn't care, because so is her coffee mug. Carlos tries to end the meeting, but Lucy says no, because they want this $10 million account. She says until this deal closes, they work through lunch and also nights. Lynette wants Friday nights to coach her daughter's basketball team, but Lucy has no sympathy, since that's now a work night. Let's hope Lynette's paid hourly. Lucy tells everyone to grab a sandwich and come back in ten minutes, then she lectures Lynette about the figurine touching. Lucy leaves, and Lynette tries to butter up Carlos to get Friday nights off. She asks him to put the brakes on Lucy, but Carlos says he hired her to crack the whip, which is what she's doing. Carlos says he'll think about asking Lucy to dial it down, but not to ask for favors like this again, because here he's not her neighbor or friend; he's her boss. Then he invites her and Tom over for cocktails Friday, and she says she's there. She's planning to get totally drunk and bitch about her boss. Hee. I love Lynette.

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Desperate Housewives

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