Desperate Housewives

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now!
Putting The "Ass"es in "Assassins"

Paul tells the cops not to bring up Felicia with Beth, and that he and Felicia have -- "with love and prayer" -- resolved their shit. So now he's going to end up killing both her sister and her daughter, and next season we'll learn that Martha and Felicia have another sister or something, and eventually he'll be forced to kill every single one of them. Either that, or it will turn out that Keith is Beth's brother and we can wrap this shit up all at once.

Next week: More lame Tom abuse, Susan's awful mother, and somebody shows up again from out of the past. I miss Zana. I can't see him ever shooting Paul, I actually think that would suck, but I just want to put it out there that I would like to see what he's been up to. As for who shot him? I really don't know. Mike would have been good. I forget half of these people exist until they show up onscreen as it is, so it's possible I wouldn't even recognize the culprit. Mostly I'm just excited to see the Youngs go all War Of The Roses -- I mean, that clearly has to happen, right? A little Ruthless People up in this bitch and I'll stop complaining about the "campy" thing forever.

Watch the episode below, discuss it in our forums, then see last season's most outlandish moments.

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Desperate Housewives




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