Desperate Housewives
Desperate Housewives

Episode Report Card
Evany: B | 495 USERS: C+
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Children And Art

Cut to Scared-y P, sitting on the couch, still reading his comic book. Lynette and Art come in, and she introduces the neighbor to P: "His sister has the cool wheelchair with the joystick?" P gives Art a listless "hi." Lynette: "In the daytime, Art coaches swimming at the Rec Center. But..." she turns to Art, "Please can I tell Parker? Please?" Art: "And compromise my secret identity? No way, Mrs. Scavo." That gets little Big P's attention. Lynette explains that Art was the one who saved her life, thanks to his superpowers. P is doubtful. Art declares that he's "Protector Man," and he pulls open the snaps on his shirt to reveal a t-shirt with a big orange "P" on the front. Little P is very impressed. Lynette explains that Parker need not worry about her anymore, seeing as she's under the protection of a superhero. Parker runs outside to play. Art explains to Lynette that the handy t-shirt is from Purdue. Much ballyhoo was made on the boards over the fact that the orange of the P is not one of Purdue's colors, so maybe that "P" stands for something else. "Pervert" perhaps? "Pedophile"? "Predator"? But I get ahead of myself.

Casa Boring Board. Edie pulls up in Mike's truck, and Mike hobbles out of the passenger door. The fuzz is there in full force; looks as though they got that search warrant. Unfortunately, the cops can't seem to find the one thing they're looking for: Mike's toolbox. As the lawmen mutter to one another in frustration, Mrs. McC, who's out raking leaves in front of her house, listens in.

Back at the Photo shoot of Punishment, Gabby's agent marches in and promptly informs Gabby that she is "nothing." It's okay for young model Tanya to pull the "diva crap" because she's the "star." Clueless Gabby: "Where do you get off talking to me like that? I shot thirty covers by the time I was twenty!" Agent reminds Gabby that she's now "thirty," and Gabby frowns. Agent: "When you make that face, you look thirty-five." Gabby makes a last-ditch attempt at pulling some diva shit, citing the many photographers who would kill to shoot her...with their cameras, but Agent snarks that she had to pull major strings just to get Gabby this gig. After a lecture about how the modeling world has "moved on" ever since Gabby gave it all up for her suburban dream, Agent commands Gabby to get her "polyester ass" onto the set and "act like the pro" that Gabby once was.

Desperate Housewives

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