Desperate Housewives

Episode Report Card
DeAnn Welker: B- | 1118 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
His Pants Are On Fire

Blue Odyssey walks into the White Horse, and Creepy Dave asks if they're all psyched. Carlos says he feels like he's going to puke again. Oh, nervous Carlos is adorable. The guys walk up to the band of kids, and ask if they're Cold Splash. They are. So Creepy Dave says they're Blue Odyssey, but the kids can see that. They invite the oldsters to a party after the gig, and Tom says, "Absotively. We've just got to check with our wives." At least Mike hits him on the arm for that. If no one did, that scene would have left me so unsatisfied.

Bree comes out of her house to see Lee and Tom talking to the reporter. When she asks them why, they tell her how much dirt the reporter's found on Bree -- a lot of it stuff even these guys didn't know (things that happened before they joined the show). The reporter knows Bree was a drunk. She knows Rex was into S&M hookers. And she's going to the Battle of the Bands to see Orson harmonize with the guy he tried to kill. Bree walks off without answering any of Tom and Lee's questions.

Gaby's ready for the party, and when she heads outside, Grandma Nutjob is waiting there with her limo. Grandma Nutjob seems to have confused Gaby telling her she couldn't go to the movies because she was watching Carlos's band play with an invitation for Grandma Nutjob to come. Gaby tries to get out of it, but ends up relenting.

Porter runs into the hospital looking for Anne. Lynette tells him she's okay. She says she went over to talk to Anne about "recent developments," and Porter's pissed. You know, because it sucks when you're 16 and your mom won't let you hang out with your pregnant, married, 40-plus-year-old girlfriend. Porter looks at Anne and then runs out. Lynette follows. There's a meaningless scene in which the McCluskey sisters are walking down Wisteria Lane wondering what else they can figure out from the phone. They realize the doctor's the key, and maybe they'll head to Boston. Ironically, he drives right by them and parks in front of Creepy Dave's. Edie drives by and invites him to the rock concert. He says he'll pass but she gives him a flier before leaving and he sees Creepy Dave on it. I'm thinking he's feeling like a rock concert after all.

At the Battle of the Bands, Grandma Nutjob is boring Gaby with her tales of bad help. Susan and Jackson are sitting in another booth, where Susan is obsessing over Julie and Steven Weber. She wants to do something about it, but Jackson points out that Julie's a grown woman and if she wants to accept the proposal, it's her business. Jackson won't let her ruin the surprise of the proposal. She agrees to stay out of it. But then she gets up and supposedly heads to the little girl's room. She asks Warren why Steven Weber just handed him a CD. He says that there's a song he wanted him to play so he could propose to his girlfriend. Susan's not thrilled to find out that will happen tonight. Warren hits play on the song, and "Julie, Do You Love Me" starts playing. It's terrible. Possibly worse than "Mustang Sally," except that we have to hear that one again. So it's really a tie. Susan awkwardly follows Julie and Steven Weber out to the dance floor. They're dancing together, as two people will do, and Susan dances right next to them, saying she loves this song and Jackson doesn't like to dance. She makes a lot of hints about being young and single and how great that is. Julie and Steve Weber try to get rid of Susan, but she won't take the hint, so Jackson comes to take her away. She asks Julie to say "no" no matter what he asks. Then she says she doesn't want her daughter to be someone's fourth wife. Julie tells him she's not getting married. Ever. Susan's like, "What do you mean 'ever'?" Julie walks off, needing time to herself. Steve Weber glares, and then walks off, too.

Desperate Housewives

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